


Tangled Webs Don't Just Weave Themselves, You Know

by LoneWulffe



Category: Supergirl (TV 2015)
Genre: (in which I take a silly concept and run wild with it), Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, F/M, Fledgling Guardcorp, Fluff and Humor, Guest Stars, Minor Sanvers, Misunderstandings
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-12-25
Updated: 2017-12-25
Packaged: 2019-02-20 05:47:15
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 25,583
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13140342
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/LoneWulffe/pseuds/LoneWulffe
Summary: Kara and Mon-El break up (sort of) when Mike is exposed by Lena as a despicable jerk who has been cheating on Kara.With Supergirl.Also there is a wedding.But maybe it would be best to start at the beginning...





	Tangled Webs Don't Just Weave Themselves, You Know

**Author's Note:**

> No betas were forced to give up their holidays for the sake of this fic (although I'd like to say thanks to a friend of mine for giving part of this story a read-through and assuring me it was going fine) so any mistakes you spot are my fault alone. (I expect there might be quite a few since I spent a lot of late nights writing this thing and the sleepiness probably made me a bit careless.)
> 
> The special guest stars of this fic belong to Blizzard.
> 
> This story is pretty much an AU fic where Rhea didn't compete for the title of Worst Mother-in-Law in the Universe and left our precious puppies alone so they could be happy and cute together and didn't get separated. So basically no angst to be found here! Well, mostly; there might be a few crumbs here and there that could have slipped in. But other than those crumbs, this is at least 99% fluff and hilarity. Enjoy!

> _O, what a tangled web we weave,_
> 
> _When first we practise to deceive! – Sir Walter Scott, Marmion; A Tale of Flodden Field_

 

* * *

 

“You know, I have to admit,” Mon-El commented as they entered the glamorous and well-decorated ballroom, “humans aren't too bad at throwing parties considering their limited level of technology and all that. I mean, I've seen way better, of course, but not bad.”

Kara let out an exasperated sigh and elbowed him lightly although she couldn't help the bemused smile that formed on her lips. “You're not seriously comparing Lena's charity gala to a celebration held by the royal house of Daxam, are you?”

He gave her a look of feigned innocence at that. “Well, I was thinking of a few other festivals I've been to on other planets but now that you mention it...”

“Oh please,” she laughed, “you were definitely hinting at that and you know it.”

“I resent the accusation. It's just your Kryptonian bias speaking.” He artfully dodged her attempt to smack his arm, grinning all the while, although his expression shifted to something a little more serious a second later. “That reminds me. I was going to tell you not to expect to see me all that much for the next few days especially at night.”

To say that she was surprised – and to be honest a little uneasy – was an understatement. “Why? What's going on?”

He winced. “Hozz'ni wedding celebrations. They've rented out the entire bar for the festivities and everyone's been asked to put in overtime. Everything has to be set up by sunset and we have to stick around until about sunrise every day until it's over.”

“Ah.” Kara found herself mirroring his pained facial expression. A species that was most easily described as humanoid grizzly bears, the Hozz'ni had an intergalactic reputation for throwing some of the wildest and most disorderly parties ever known. It said a lot that even Krypton considered their concept of festivities to be even worse than anything a Daxamite could even imagine. She could see why the bar would need all their employees to be there especially if they could theoretically help deal with any unruly patrons... and since Hozz'ni were involved, there would definitely be a few brawls to break up at the very least. Mon-El and his co-workers were going to have their hands full.

Sensing that she was beginning to worry, he quickly put on a reassuring smile and clasped her shoulders in an attempt to calm her. “I'll be fine. Nothing I won't be able to handle. After all, I was trained by the best, right?” he added with a wink.

“Of course,” she sighed. “It's just...”

“Just...?” he prodded.

She fidgeted a little and ducked her head in a sudden bout of shyness. “I'm going to miss you,” she mumbled so softly that it would likely have been impossible for him to pick up what she had said if not for his enhanced hearing.

It was stupid. It wasn't as if she'd never lived by herself before and there had been days since they'd started dating where Mon-El had not stayed the night for one reason or another. Those days had gotten increasingly infrequent, however, and she'd gotten used to at least either going to sleep or waking up with him depending on when his shifts at the bar started or ended. Now, the concept of going several days without that simple source of comfort was... unthinkable.

“Hey, come on.” He gently tipped her chin up so he could meet her downcast gaze with his warm one. “How about this? I may not be able to be there in the morning or night but I can and will meet you for lunch for the next few days. The Hozz'ni will be sleeping during the daytime and that's when we all get our break so I'll be free to swing by and see you.”

The offer was incredibly tempting but Kara wasn't blind to the implications. “Won't you be really tired by then? Those will be the few hours you'll be able to get any rest; I don't want you to sacrifice your sleep for something so pointless.”

“Nothing that makes you happy could ever be pointless,” he corrected her with a smile. “And don't worry about me; I already plan to crash in the DEO's med-bay under the sun lamps to make up for it.”

“I think J'onn would consider that to be abusing DEO resources for personal use,” she pointed out even as she allowed herself to be swayed a little by his unorthodox suggestion.

“Nah, I think he'll be okay with it. He's got a soft spot for me after all. If he says no at first, I'll say I need it so I can be at my best if and when I need to back you up. And if that still isn't enough to convince him, I'll throw in the 'it'll make you happy' argument. That'll definitely get him to approve it,” he said somewhat cheekily.

“He is _not_ going to bend DEO rules for something like that!” she tried to counter although she had to admit – privately at least anyway – that J'onn did in fact let her and Alex get away with quite a lot.

Mon-El chuckled and pulled her closer so he could drop a kiss on her forehead. “Yeah, even you don't believe what you just said. So is that a yes then?”

“...Fine, yes, I'd love that,” she caved after a few seconds, internally giving herself a little credit for trying to put up at least some resistance to his crazy plan. “But the moment I see you so much as yawn I'm flying you back to the DEO, knocking you out and shoving you under all the sun lamps we have on hand myself, you got that?”

“Roger. No yawning.” He gave her a mock salute – with the wrong hand, no less – and made it worse by failing to look serious in any way. “Now that we've settled that, can I start making it up to you in advance by asking you for a dance or five?”

“Yes, but later,” she answered and couldn't help but grin at the exaggerated pout he gave her in response. “It would be very rude of us not to say hi to Lena first so let's go find her and save her from her other guests for a few minutes, okay? Then you can ask me to dance with you as many times as you like.”

He shrugged carelessly, having expected some form of that answer already. “Lead the way.”

Luckily for the both of them, their target was easily found after a few minutes of searching and by the time they made their way to her, the elderly couple the L-Corp CEO had been speaking to had already taken their leave.

“Kara! I'm so glad you could make it! And nice to see you again, Mike!” Lena enthused the moment she noticed them.

“Of course we were going to show up!” Kara playfully scolded her as she went in for a hug. “Friends support each other especially when they're doing something so important, you know.”

“Of course,” Lena chuckled as she released Kara and turned to shake Mon-El's hand. “It's a good thing you came with Kara because I'm afraid I'm going to be tied up for most of the night talking to all my donors and I'd hate for her to be bored out of her mind as a result.”

“That's what I'm here for,” Mon-El grinned. “Well, that and making sure she doesn't eat everything in sight so your other guests don't starve.”

His remark elicited a hearty laugh from Lena and an outraged gasp from Kara. “See if I bring you along next time I get invited to any event,” she grumbled as she smacked his arm.

“Of course you have to. It's not like you'll find anything else happening at one of these things as interesting as me, after all,” he teased.

As if the universe had heard his statement and felt the need to correct him, a sudden burst of gunfire accompanied by the sound of shattering glass and the screams of the other guests interrupted their otherwise pleasant conversation. Having instinctively ducked their heads at the commotion even as they searched for its source, both Kara and Mon-El were spared having to expend much effort in that regard when a voice cut through the tense atmosphere.

“All right, people,” someone – presumably the leader – spoke up and the crowd parted to reveal a bunch of armed men dressed from head to toe in black, “you should be smart enough to know what comes next. Just put your valuables in the bags my friends will be coming by with in a short moment and everybody will get to leave here without a bullet hole in their head.”

Great. Trust the scum of National City to not only be so crass as to try to rob a charity event but also interrupt what she had hoped was going to be just a fun night relaxing with her best friend and boyfriend. Kara spared a moment to glare at the criminals before she met Mon-El's serious gaze with her own.

“Protect the guests,” she mouthed and offered him a smile when he responded with a determined nod of his head. Both of them then sprung to action at the same time with him quickly hustling Lena and a few other people close to them as far away from the chaos as possible while she made a dash for the nearest exit. Once she was out of sight and after checking to make sure there weren't any security cameras nearby, she changed into her super-suit and flew back into the ballroom through the hole the gunmen had so helpfully opened up in the glass dome ceiling.

“It's Supergirl!” cried out one of the guests in relief upon noticing her arrival.

“I'm going to have to ask you guys to show me your invitations because I don't think you're on the guest list,” she called out with her arms crossed in front of her authoritatively as the criminals spun to look up at her.

“What the hell are you guys waiting for?!” their leader roared at his henchmen. “Shoot her!”

She had to suppress the urge to roll her eyes at his order even as she began catching the bullets flying her way to prevent them from bouncing off her and causing collateral damage. Why did bad guys keep trying that tactic when practically everyone knew she was bulletproof? Unless of course they got their hands on Kryptonite... which wasn't a thought she wanted to entertain. _Focus, Kara_ , she scolded herself as she flew down to ground level and began taking the gunmen out one by one.

“Screw this!” she heard someone yell in the midst of the fight and spotted one of the criminals make a break for it out of the corner of her eye. Just as she was about to utter a curse under her breath at the idea of letting one get away, she saw a familiar figure dash out from somewhere the crowd and give chase.

As proud as she was of Mon-El in that moment, she could not stop a small seed of worry from taking root in her mind. He was currently in his civilian identity so he had to limit his usage of his powers... which meant that if things took a sudden turn for the worse, he might get into some serious trouble. Gritting her teeth at all the scenarios playing out in her head, she worked a little faster to take down the criminals she was facing and flew straight out the way she came in the moment she knocked the last guy unconscious.

The first thing she saw when she located Mon-El running down an alleyway was the sight of the fleeing gunman turning around to shoot him.

Kara had never flown faster in all her life.

It was probably only thanks to his enhanced reflexes that Mon-El was able to stop before he crashed right into her as she flew in just in time to curl her fist around the bullet that had been headed straight for his heart. Fear and anger coiled tight around her mind and she barely managed to hold herself back when she spun around to deliver a roundhouse punch to the gunman that sent him flying a few feet away. Sparing only a split second to make sure that he was down for the count, she turned to face Mon-El and grabbed him by his arms.

“Mon-El! Thank Rao I got here in time!” she breathed in relief and began scanning him for potential injuries. Even though the logical part of her brain was aware that she'd prevented him from getting shot, the terror and adrenaline from just seconds ago still had an ironclad grip on her thought processes. “You're not hurt, are you?!”

“Hey, hey, calm down,” he said soothingly as he cupped her face in his hands. “I'm fine, okay? You showed up just in time to save me from being turned into Parmesan cheese.”

“It's Swiss cheese,” she corrected him automatically, almost sure he'd made the mistake on purpose as a way to distract her. It was moments like these that a part of her regretted encouraging him to become a superhero; with all the gun-toting criminals running around the city, he was essentially putting his life in mortal danger every single time he helped her fight crime. She knew without a doubt that she would never forgive herself if... if...

“You sure about that?” Mon-El asked with a comical frown, unwittingly pulling her out of her dark thoughts in the process. “Because I think mine sounds much more delicious.”

His ridiculous assertion drew a laugh out of her despite her grim mood. “The saying has nothing to do with taste, silly.”

He shrugged carelessly and offered her a wry grin. “I still prefer my version.” There was a slight pause as he regarded her carefully. “Feeling better now?”

Kara bit her lip self-consciously and nodded. “Yeah.” Glancing between his caring gaze and soft lips, she gave in to impulse and wrapped a hand around his tie so she could pull him close and kiss him. “Thanks,” she murmured when they broke apart, “for calming me down.”

“That's what I'm here for,” he said with a smile. “Now you and I better get back inside before Lena or anyone else notices Kara Danvers and Mike Matthews are missing. Especially Lena because I think she might have seen me running after the gunman and think I'm dead or something.”

“Right. You'd better head back in then. I'll see you in a bit.” With that, they released each other and went their separate ways. She watched him jog back the way he'd come for a moment before she flew to the exit she'd used herself, quickly changed back into her civilian clothes and slipped back inside the ballroom. A quick glance around ensured that no one in the crowd had noticed her return and she breathed a quiet sigh of relief before she began searching for Mon-El. Luckily, he had returned to almost the exact same spot they'd met Lena who she also found there with him.

“Thank goodness you're okay,” Mon-El exclaimed once he spotted her making her way to them. “I lost sight of you in the chaos and got so worried.”

“I'm fine. Just got dragged away from you guys by the crowd,” she said as she let him envelop her in a hug. “Don't you think you're laying it on a little thick?” she whispered in his ear.

“Just trying to sell it,” he whispered back. “Lena's been giving off this really weird aura since I got back and it's kind of making me nervous.”

One look at Lena after they let each other go confirmed Mon-El's observation; her best friend seemed incredibly tense and had an inscrutable look painted on her face. “Lena, are you okay?” Kara asked tentatively. “You didn't get hurt, did you?”

“Oh no, I'm perfectly fine,” Lena replied with a rather strained smile. “Just a little troubled by recent events.”

Kara winced and nodded sympathetically. Lena's dour countenance made a lot of sense in light of her statement; Lena cared a great deal about her philanthropic activities both as a person with her heart in the right place and as someone who was working hard to salvage her family name. Seeing her efforts ruined by a bunch of lowlife criminals had to be incredibly aggravating. “At least Supergirl managed to save the day, right?” Kara offered helpfully in an attempt to improve her friend's mood.

“That's what I said. Saved my life too; that guy would've killed me if she hadn't jumped in,” Mon-El chipped in somewhat overeagerly. He'd clearly said something to that effect when he'd first returned and likely gotten questioned by Lena about the gunman he'd chased... to no avail, from the looks of it.

Some undefinable emotion flickered across Lena's face so quickly Kara was almost sure she'd imagined it. “Yes, thank goodness Supergirl was nearby,” she said in a strangely neutral voice.

Wondering to herself what could possibly explain Lena's unusual behaviour, Kara was drawn out of her musings when her ears picked up the sound of approaching police sirens. She let out a sigh and gave up trying to figure out this particular puzzle in favour of silently bemoaning the way the night had ended. So much for being able to dance the night away with Mon-El before she had to deal with several days of barely seeing him outside of the lunch dates he'd suggested.

Little did she know that her troubles were only just beginning... and that she should've been a little more concerned about Lena than she'd been in that moment.

 

* * *

 

The next morning, Kara woke up to a veritable feast prepared by none other than her master chef boyfriend.

“To make up for last night,” Mon-El explained with a huge smile when she questioned him about it in between mouthfuls of French toast. “Oh, just so you know, I have a few errands to run today so I won't be able to have lunch with you but I'm going to see if I can come home for a bit just before I have to start work.”

“You don't have to if it's too much of a hassle,” she said worriedly. “I don't want you to be late and get in trouble with your boss.”

“I think someone's forgetting that I have superpowers,” he pointed out bemusedly. “I'll just hop a few buildings and superspeed the rest of the way. Speaking of which,” he glanced at the clock, “I'd better get going. See you later. And remember to chew.” He swooped in to give her a quick goodbye kiss, effectively cutting off whatever retort she'd intended to fire back at him for that comment in the process, and dashed out the door.

Once he'd closed the door behind him, Mon-El quickly jogged downstairs and began making his way to his first stop of the day. If he timed everything just right and there were no delays, he would be able to keep his promise to return just before all the madness began.

Luckily for him, Winn was already waiting at the cafe they'd chosen as their meeting point by the time he arrived. The DEO's resident tech genius was calmly sipping a cup of coffee and tapping away at his laptop but looked up the moment Mon-El walked up to his table.

“Hey buddy!” Winn greeted him with a smile and got up so he could carry out his part of their special handshake a little more comfortably before both of them sat down. “Okay, now that we're actually having this secret rendezvous, are you finally going to tell me what this is all about? What kind of favour do you need from me that requires my laptop and why couldn't we just have met in the DEO?”

Mon-El fidgeted in his seat as he considered how to go about this while maintaining some level of but finally gave up and decided to be straightforward about it. “Do you have Krypton's calendar?” he blurted out. At Winn's stunned expression, he hurriedly clarified himself. “I mean like have you ever calculated how long the days and years were compared to Earth and putting it into... you know, calendar form or something? Did Kara ever ask you to do it or have you ever just tried out of curiosity?”

“Well...” Winn dragged out the word as the initial shock Mon-El's unusual request wore off and he began thinking clearly again. “Yeah, but I can't take all the credit I guess. I measured the time differences between the planets but the calendar itself was part of the trove of information stored in the database stored in the AI Kara's mom put in her pod. I've never thought of combining them before though.” He chanced a glance at the serious look on his friend's face. “Not before today, at least. Is this the favour you were asking me for?”

“Yeah,” Mon-El sighed in relief. “Could you... I don't know, install it in my phone or something? And make it so it syncs with Earth's calendar so I know when certain days align?”

“Sure, no problem. Just hand your phone over and I'll get it done in a flash.” Winn accepted the device Mon-El passed to him and began hooking it up to his laptop after he'd dug out the right cable from his bag. “So,” he started as he began loading the programs he needed to complete his task, “can I ask what this is all about?”

“It's for Kara,” the Daxamite finally confessed after a moment of internally debating how much to reveal. “Sort of. I know when her Earth birthday is and... other stuff.” He'd marked all their anniversaries down from their first kiss – even if both of them had pretended it hadn't happened back then – to their first time fighting together side by side. Their six-month anniversary was coming up and he made a mental note to research what would be an appropriate way to mark the milestone later. “But I don't know when her real birthday is – not when it happens on Earth anyway – and what days Krypton's celebrations were held on.”

“Didn't you guys have the same celebrations?” Winn asked quizzically over the sound of his rapid-fire typing. “You should be able to remember those on your own, right?”

Mon-El shrugged somewhat uncomfortably at that. There was no easy way to confess that his life back on Daxam had been such a blur of drugs, alcohol and sex that he'd only been vaguely aware of the passage of time. It hadn't helped that festivities on his home planet even and especially those dedicated to the gods had been mostly excuses to indulge themselves in more of the same. “Just want to make sure,” he offered instead. “Daxam worshipped the entire pantheon while Krypton only worshipped Rao and had a few celebrations dedicated to him that we didn't.”

“Okay. I'm guessing the reason we're doing this out here instead of in the DEO is you don't want Kara to find out about this?” he asked and got a short nod in response. “Thought so. Well, one Krypton-to-Earth calendar coming right up.”

The next few minutes were spent in somewhat companionable silence as Winn focused on his task while Mon-El indulged in a bit of people-watching – a habit he'd picked up when he had still been learning how to fit in on Earth. His new home planet. He liked to think of it like that now.

“Aaaaaaand done!”

The proud exclamation drew Mon-El out of his sudden bout of sentimentality and when he turned to face his friend, he found Winn already handing his phone back to him. “That fast?” he asked in surprise.

Winn gave him a look of mock hurt at that. “Really, dude? You're questioning my speed and technical skills? I thought we were friends.”

Mon-El laughed as he pocketed his phone. “Right, right. Sorry. Pretend I didn't say anything.” They both got out of their seats and he used the opportunity to pull Winn in for a hug. “Seriously though, thanks a lot. I'm glad we actually _are_ friends.”

“Same here, man,” Winn replied with a grin. “Although it would be nice if you didn't cheat so much when we play Battlefront together.”

“It's not my fault your hand-eye coordination is terrible,” Mon-El teased as he released Winn and chanced a glance at his watch. “Grife, I better get going or I'm going to be late.”

His statement caused Winn to check the time as well and then let out a groan. “I should head to the DEO myself or J'onn's going to get mad. Or, you know, just silently look at me in mild disapproval as I walk in. Which is probably worse.”

“Sorry,” Mon-El said with genuine regret. “You should tell him it's my fault; you were doing me a favour after all.”

“Nah, it's fine. I'll live.” There was a brief pause before Winn spoke up again just as they stepped out onto the pavement. “Hey, Mon-El?”

“Hmm?” The Daxamite looked back to find his friend regarding him rather seriously in contrast to the jokey mood of a few seconds ago.

“I think Kara's really going to appreciate what you're doing for her even if I don't know the specifics.” Winn's features softened into a smile. “And you should know that I'm rooting for the two of you.”

Mon-El didn't bother to try suppressing the answering smile that spread across his face. “I hope so. And thanks.” With that, he waved goodbye and began jogging towards his next destination of the day in an effort to make up for lost time. It was a good thing he'd memorised the route he needed to take the day before and that his powers meant that he didn't have to slow down to catch his breath for even a second. Even so, he was almost sure he was still going to be a little late and began praying that he would be forgiven.

Just as he was a short distance away from his destination, however, his phone beeped and he checked it only to find a message telling him the meeting point had changed to a nearby alleyway. Puzzled but thinking nothing more of it, he shrugged and headed for the entrance to the specified alleyway-

-and got a face full of snow the moment he turned the corner.

“You're late!” he heard someone scold over the sound of his own sputtering as he struggled to wipe his face clean and spit out any snow that had managed to get into his mouth.

“And that warranted ambushing me? Really, Jaina?” he complained and shot a glare at his attacker once he'd managed to wipe off all the snow.

The blonde standing in front of him laughed. “Oh come on, you big baby. It's not like I threw an icicle at you. You'd probably be fine even if I did that anyway. Here.” She held out a handkerchief for him as he stepped closer. “Consider this an apology.”

“I'd prefer one that actually had the word 'sorry' in it somewhere,” he grumbled but grudgingly accepted the proffered item and dried his face with it before giving it back. “I was going to be nice and ask how you were doing but now I just want to get this conversation over with.”

“You're such a grouch. It's a wonder you still have loyal customers like me,” she sighed but the twinkle in her blue eyes made it clear she was still in a teasing mood. Reaching into her messenger bag, she pulled out an envelope and handed it over. “About what you asked for... I figured you might want to see for yourself instead of just getting a verbal update from me.”

Mon-El let out an impressed hum as he studied the photos contained within: various shots of a hulking green-skinned alien caring for a creature that, aside from its midnight blue fur, was not dissimilar from a wolf as it nursed its small litter of pups. “It's good to see Snowsong's recovering and her puppies are doing fine. Although I assume Go'el's still worrying about them like the end of the world is near?”

“You don't know the half of it,” Jaina groaned. “I admit I was concerned too since it's her first pregnancy but he's still so tense even though his own tribe's shaman has declared that she and her puppies will be fine. Getting him to eat and sleep every day is a real chore.”

Laughing as he slipped the photos back into the envelope and tucked it into his jacket pocket, Mon-El couldn't pass up the opportunity to tease her. “It's a good thing you love him or he'd probably be encased in a solid block of ice already.”

“It's not like I don't bring my share of problems to our relationship, you know,” she pointed out wryly. “Having his only daughter turn out to be a metahuman has been difficult enough to accept but the moment my father learns about Go'el heads _will_ roll. And I don't mean metaphorically.”

He winced. “I have a rough idea of what you're going through.” In his case, he was lucky his own father had finally been swayed by Kara's frankly reckless attempt to rescue him from his parents' ship and his mother had been forced to accept that he was happier on Earth. Whether the same outcome was in Jaina's future was anyone's guess. “Still, I'm rooting for you guys. I think you'll be able to make it in the end.”

The blonde sighed and patted his shoulder in a gesture of gratitude before stepping away. “I hope so. Anyway, I'll see you around at the bar like usual when it's open again. Good luck with the Hozz'ni.”

“Thanks, I think I'm going to need it.” He waved goodbye and turned to leave himself...

...when someone came barrelling right into him as he stepped out of the alleyway and caught him by surprise.

“Woah!” Luckily, his enhanced reflexes allowed him to catch the person by the arms, stopping them from crashing into him and potentially getting injured in the process. “Are you oka- Lena? What're you doing here?”

Sure enough, the individual in front of him was none other than the CEO of L-Corp who, for some unfathomable reason, was giving him the most murderous glare he'd ever seen her sport. If looks could kill, he was sure he'd be dead on his feet.

“You,” she snarled. “You have some nerve.”

Her hostile demeanour threw him for a loop. “Uh... what?”

“I saw you in the alleyway,” she continued in the same venomous tone. “I can't believe you'd do something like that. I thought you were a respectable guy at first but now I see you're just another worthless jackass.”

Completely lost as to what Lena was talking about, Mon-El replayed his entire conversation with Jaina and tried to imagine what it might have looked like to someone watching from afar which he assumed was what Lena had been doing based on her current actions. Maybe Lena had thought he had been buying drugs? He'd seen quite a few crime shows on television and drug dealers were almost always doing their business in alleyways so she must have thought that the envelope Jaina had given him had been full of drugs. Sure that he'd figured it out, he tried to correct her false assumptions. “No wait, you don't understand-”

That was as far as he got, however, because Lena only got more incensed and cut him off. “I don't understand? What exactly am I not understanding?! There is no way you could hope to come up with a decent explanation as to why you're cheating on Kara!”

His brain short-circuited at the unexpected accusation. “What?” But all he'd done was talk to Jaina! Lena couldn't possibly think that counted as cheating, could it?

“And if you think you can convince me not to tell Kara about this, you're sadly mistaken,” she finished coldly before turning on her heels and stalking off, leaving him frozen on the spot in shock and confusion.

When Mon-El's brain finally rebooted, the first thing that fell out of his mouth was a litany of curses in his native tongue. How in Rao's name was he going to get out of this mess?

 

* * *

 

In her defence, Kara had had absolutely no reason to even suspect anything when she received a message from Lena asking if they could have lunch together at the last minute and had thus happily agreed to it without a second thought. It was only when she arrived at the restaurant Lena had suggested to find her friend looking so gravely serious that she began to feel like she was walking into the proverbial lion's den. Deciding that she was just imagining things, Kara dismissed the idea and greeted Lena like normal.

The illusion that everything was fine immediately crumbled the moment Lena began speaking.

“How well do you know Mike?” she asked without preamble.

Caught by surprise at the unexpected question, Kara gaped silently across the table as she tried to gather her thoughts. “Um... well enough, I guess?”

“Do you know what he does for a living? Where he works? Who he hangs out with?” Lena continued bombarding her with questions.

“Yes, yes and yes. Lena, what is this all about?” To say that Kara was confused was an understatement; she'd never seen her friend behave like this before. Just what in the world had brought this on?

Unfortunately for Kara, Lena ignored her question and resumed her interrogation. “Has he ever acted suspiciously before? Or kept secrets from you?”

 _Well, there was that time he pretended he was just a lowly palace guard when we first met but then I found out he was actually the crown prince of Daxam and I broke up with him because of that. But we worked things out thanks to a guy who mentally trapped me in a musical world and I've threatened to drop a mountain on him if he ever lies to me again so we're good now_ , Kara mentally answered but did not say out loud. There were way too many things to explain and part of said explanation would involve a 'I know about Daxam because I'm from Krypton and by the way I'm Supergirl' confession somewhere which... was far from ideal. Best to just avoid the question. “Seriously, Lena, what's going on?” she asked instead. “You're starting to really worry me here.”

“He's not what he seems,” Lena said coldly. “I saw... something... the other day and I've been wrestling over how to break this to you because I know you really like him but you deserve to know.”

Dread began to creep up on her and Kara fought to keep it from showing on her face. Oh god, what had Lena seen Mon-El do? Had he accidentally used his powers in front of her and she now knew that Mike 'No Longer of the Interns' Matthews was not in fact a normal human? Maybe she'd suspected him from the start due to his odd behaviour but had thought nothing of it until she'd seen... whatever the hell she'd seen and figured out he was an alien. This was bad. This was really, really bad. “Whatever it is, Lena, I'm sure you misunderstood,” she laughed nervously in an attempt to mask her growing panic. “There's nothing to be suspicious about where Mike is concerned.”

Her attempt to dissuade Lena from her line of thinking, however, failed to yield the results she desired. “I should have known you'd be unwilling to believe me,” Lena sighed. “I mean, I was expecting it but it's still a little upsetting. But I'll show you,” she quickly added, her conviction clear in both her tone and posture, “and you'll see that I'm right.”

Thoughts of a nice fun lunch with her best friend now far from her mind, Kara was besieged by mental images of Lena turning into her mother and kidnapping Mon-El so she could run experiments on him to prove he was an alien. It would be Cadmus all over again... but in the name of friendship. Somehow. How in Rao's name was she going to get out of this mess?

 

* * *

 

Mon-El ran up the stairs leading to Kara's apartment, mentally counting down the time he had left until he absolutely had to be at the bar. He was going to end up cutting it close but he could not let Lena tell Kara about his supposed cheating before he got a chance to explain himself. The thought of allowing her to even think for a second that he would ever do that to her was unbearable. If it meant that he had to ruin the surprise he'd planned for her birthday – which luckily was still a while away according to Winn's calendar – in the process, then so be it. He'd promised that he would never lie to her again and he was going to keep that promise even without the threat of being flattened by a mountain almost literally hanging over his head.

Inside, Kara paced nervously around her living space as she anxiously waited for Mon-El to come back. She had to warn him that Lena was beginning to suspect that he wasn't regular Mike Matthews and might try to expose his identity. While it was true that he didn't have a proper superhero identity to protect like her, he was already doing a superhero's work and that meant potential enemies who would undoubtedly try to seek revenge if they ever found out who he really was and where he lived and worked.

Just as she turned around to begin another round of pacing, Mon-El burst through the door and their eyes met. As one, they both heaved a sigh of relief.

“We have to talk,” they said in unison and blinked owlishly at each other once they realised they'd both spoken at exactly the same time. “Wait, you too?”

“Let me say my piece first,” Mon-El begged as he quickly shut the door behind him. “It's really serious and I need you to listen.”

Kara barked out a laugh which, against her will, had a slight hysterical edge to it. “Uh, I'm pretty sure what I have to say is even more serious so please let me go first. Trust me, you need to hear this.”

Their argument was cut short by a rapid series of knocks on the door and a shared sense of dread descended upon the apartment. The feeling only increased with every step that brought Kara closer to the door until she finally opened it.

Sure enough, her visitor was none other than one Lena Luthor.

“Hi, Lena,” Kara greeted her friend woodenly as she waited for things to start going downhill.

It didn't take long.

“Oh good, you're home-” Lena started only to stop in her tracks both physically and verbally upon noticing the other person standing in the apartment.

“Hi Lena,” Mon-El croaked feebly as he raised his hand in the most half-hearted attempt at a wave Kara had ever seen.

“You,” Lena all but hissed. “What do you think you're doing here?”

“I-” That was as far as he got before Lena stalked over to him and the rest of his sentence died on his lips at the sight of her murderous glare.

“Here to fill Kara's head with your lies so she won't believe me when I talk to her about you? Well that's not going to happen. Not now, not ever. I meant to find undeniable proof first before I brought this to Kara but you have forced my hand.” With that, she spun on her heels to face Kara who had up until now been watching the whole thing in silent horror and pointed an accusing finger in Mon-El's face. “He's cheating on you.”

Mon-El winced while Kara stared at him and Lena in shock. “What?” She was torn between feeling relieved that Lena was not in fact anywhere close to figuring out that 'Mike' was actually an alien and being utterly confused as to what had prompted this accusation. The idea of Mon-El cheating on her was admittedly incredibly hard for her to contemplate considering everything.

Letting out a defeated sigh, Mon-El gave up on the idea of surprising Kara on her birthday and prepared to confess everything. “I can explain-”

“Oh please do,” Lena chuckled darkly as she turned to glare daggers at him. “I'd like to hear what explanation you could possibly come up with for kissing someone that isn't Kara.”

Now it was Mon-El's turn to be confused. “What?” He was pretty sure he hadn't kissed Jaina. They'd barely even touched! There was also the fact that Jaina would definitely have encased him in a block of ice if he ever tried... and Go'el would probably turn his head into pulp for trying to get cozy with his mate. Just what in the world was Lena going on about?

Luckily – or unluckily depending on one's perspective – for the both of them, Lena proceeded to clarify herself.

“I saw you that night. I ran after you because I was worried that you were going to get hurt and I wouldn't be able to face Kara if I let that happen. Except you were fine because your _other girlfriend_ came to your rescue.”

The dread from before made its unwelcome return as the pieces began falling into place for Lena's audience of two.

“I saw the two of you kiss,” Lena continued, her voice dripping with contempt as she turned back to face Kara whose face was turning paler and paler by the second. “Did he tell you that part of the story? That he and Supergirl kissed after she saved his life?”

 _Oh god_ , both of them realised at the same time, _she's talking about the charity gala._

Kara had never thought that there would ever come a day where she would regret kissing Mon-El but this seemed like a really good time to make an exception.

They both stared at each other in horror, unsure how they had avoided the mess they'd initially expected only to wind up in a drastically worse one.

“Mike...” Kara murmured hoarsely, her mind in so much chaos that it was a small miracle she had remembered to call him by the 'right' name.

Recognising the signs that she was on the verge of having a nervous breakdown, Mon-El hurriedly tried to do some damage control. “Kara, calm down.”

Unfortunately, that only seemed to push her over the edge. “Calm down?!” she all but screamed at him as she flailed around helplessly. “How can you expect me to calm down?!” This was an unmitigated disaster. Her secret was in danger of being exposed and it was all because she'd been impulsive and kissed him without being aware of her surroundings... or in this case, the presence of potential witnesses. Witnesses who, in this case, only knew both of them in their civilian identities.

“You have no right to tell her to calm down, you ass,” Lena snapped, unwittingly reminding the both of them that they once again had an audience... who once again did not have a clear understanding of the situation. “Kara doesn't need to hear your pitiful excuses or explanations and she certainly doesn't need someone in her life who treats her so deplorably.”

Then she grabbed Mon-El by the wrist and dragged him towards the door – something which was only possible because the poor guy allowed it as he was still trying to process everything that had just happened including the accusations thrown at him – and shoved him outside before slamming the door shut in his face.

Kara stared dumbly at her front door as she too struggled to come to terms with what had just transpired.

“There!” Lena's satisfied exclamation snapped her out of her daze and she turned to regard her friend who was sporting a very self-satisfied smile on her face. “Now that we've gotten rid of that jerk, we should celebrate. The classic remedy for these things is ice cream and cheesy romance movies, right?”

“Celebrate?” Kara echoed faintly.

Lena gave her a pitying look. “This is a good thing, Kara. I know how much you liked him but he was cheating on you. You deserve better than that. So yes, we're going to celebrate getting him out of your life. Now please tell me you have some ice cream on hand.”

“In the freezer,” Kara answered robotically, rooted in place even as Lena walked off in the direction of the fridge. If she wasn't misunderstanding the situation she was currently in right now, she was pretty sure Lena had just sort of helped 'end' her relationship with Mon-El. Because he had supposedly been cheating on her. With her own superhero identity.

Forget ice cream; she was starting to wish she had a bottle of Aldebaran rum on hand because she desperately needed to get drunk this very second.

 

* * *

 

Mon-El fought back a yawn as he approached CatCo's main entrance with a takeout bag full of Kara's favourite dishes from their neighbourhood Thai restaurant. Even though he was practically dead on his feet and the short nap he'd had had done little to restore his energy levels, he was determined to keep his promise to have lunch with Kara despite – or rather especially because of – the frankly insane situation they were currently in thanks to a misunderstanding on Lena's part.

There was also the fact that when he'd checked his phone after finishing his shift at the bar he'd found no less than three voicemails from Kara which, when listened back to back, turned out to actually be one long rambling apology for everything from allowing Lena to kick him out of her apartment to technically being the one who created their predicament in the first place by kissing him as Supergirl. Which had in turn led to an apology for possibly suggesting that she shouldn't have kissed him because she had truly been very appreciative of his efforts to calm her down that night and she would never regret kissing him or any other part of their relationship and had she mentioned that she was really sorry about last night?

It would all have been quite endearing if not for the fact that she had sounded like she had been on the verge of tears throughout the entire thing.

Rubbing the sleep out of his eyes with one hand while carefully balancing the bag containing their lunch with the other, Mon-El walked into the main lobby while silently praying that he could avoid falling asleep mid-conversation. It was crucial that he reassure her that he didn't blame her for the situation they currently found themselves in and talk to her about how they were going to solve it without having to reveal that she was Supergirl. He just prayed that nothing else went wrong-

“You really don't know when to quit, do you?”

The familiar voice – now also familiar in how much venom it contained – made him stop in his tracks and he looked up with trepidation to find Lena glaring at him with her arms crossed in front of her.

Grife.

“Lena, I-”

“Resorting to harassing her at her workplace now, I see,” she cut him off angrily. (He started to wonder why he still tried at this point.) “Or perhaps you were going to come up with some excuse for your actions, fake an apology and beg her to take you back. Maybe you were even going to try and make her question my account of things. I wouldn't put anything past someone like you.”

Once again, Mon-El found himself unsure as to how to deal with the barrage of misguided accusations being hurled at him. For a moment, he considered trying to correct her but then he noticed a growing number of people staring at them and decided against it. Convincing Lena that she had the wrong impression of him was going to be an uphill battle and he didn't want to cause a scene – or in this case an even bigger one – at Kara's workplace. He was going to have to concede this fight.

“Okay, okay,” he sighed in defeat as he backed away towards the entrance. “I'll leave.” Deciding not to wait for a response, he turned around and exited the building only to realise that he had no idea what to do next. Completely lost and utterly dejected, he plopped down on the pavement and buried his head in his arms. At this point, he didn't care if someone stole his food or he just passed out from sheer physical and mental exhaustion.

“Mike?”

At the sound of his civilian name, he looked up blearily to find a quizzical Eve staring down at him in confusion. “Oh. Hi, Eve.”

“What're you doing sitting out here?” she asked. “Are you okay? You look terrible.”

“...It's a long story,” he replied wearily.

Eve frowned. “Well, do you want to talk about it? Does it have something to do with why you're sitting on the pavement instead of going inside to have lunch with Kara like usual? That's why you're here, right?”

“Um...” How was he supposed to explain his situation without revealing too much? “Let's just say Lena thinks I cheated on Kara and now she's making sure I stay away from her.”

“What?! How could she think that?!” Eve looked positively outraged. “There's no way you could ever cheat on Kara!”

To say that Mon-El was surprised was an understatement. “Wait, you think I'm innocent?”

Eve gave him a look that clearly communicated how ridiculous she thought he was being at that moment. “Of course! I've seen the two of you. You couldn't find two people more in love with each other if you tried.”

Despite the situation, Mon-El found it in himself to offer her a grateful smile. “Thanks, Eve. I'm glad you believe in me. And us, for that matter.” He paused, reviewed the situation and decided to kill two birds with one stone. “Do you like Thai food?”

 

* * *

 

Kara considered it a minor miracle that she'd somehow been able to function at work for the past few hours considering her current mental state. Last night had been mostly a blur of ice cream she'd barely tasted – a crime in its own right – and stupid love stories that had made her want to either curl up into a ball and cry or throw something at the screen. The moment Lena had finally called it a night and left, she'd dialled Mon-El's number and only realised belatedly that he was probably too busy to pick up so she'd left a voicemail... or two... or three... apologising for everything. She could only pray that he'd listen to them, forgive her and show up for lunch like he'd promised so she could apologise (again) and they could figure out how to solve this mess together.

Then she looked up, saw Lena walking towards her desk with a big smile on her face and had a sinking feeling she wasn't going to be seeing him anytime soon.

“Lena! What... what brings you by?” Kara asked with what she hoped was an expression of pleasant surprise plastered on her face.

“Saving you from your ex, it seems,” Lena answered, confirming Kara's worst fears.

“O-Oh, Mike was here?” Kara tried desperately to keep her voice from sounding utterly devastated as she wondered just how much worse things could possibly get.

She didn't have to wonder for very long.

“Yes, but don't worry. I not only made him leave but ensured he'll never bother you at work from now on,” Lena shared in a conspiratorial tone. “I spoke to Mr Olsen and he's agreed to have Mike banned from CatCo.”

“...He did, did he?” She was going to _kill_ James.

“Mhm,” Lena hummed, oblivious to the slightly murderous aura Kara was emitting. “We had a chat – you know, from one corporate leader to another – and he said he shared my concerns about employee wellbeing. The next time Mike shows his face around here, security is going to escort him outside and straight to the nearest police station.”

“That's... wonderful.” She was going to kill James and not even Kal was going to be able to find the body.

“But enough about that,” Lena said decisively, snapping Kara out of her homicidal fantasies in the process. “I originally came to take you out to lunch and that's what I'm going to do now. Nothing like good food to wash away this bit of unpleasantness...”

Unable to think up any plausible reason to refuse, Kara was forced to allow herself to be dragged to a restaurant of Lena's choosing where she robotically ordered something at random and ate her food without tasting it all while she half-heartedly listened to Lena trash-talk her supposed ex-boyfriend.

By the end of the meal, she found herself thinking that she would rather have fought ten Livewires at once.

Even so, she managed to endure the entire thing with what passed for a smile on her face and was able to maintain that expression until they parted ways.

Then she stomped her way back to CatCo and into James' office.

“What the hell, James?!” she shouted at him without preamble.

To his credit, James had the decency to both automatically realise what she was talking about and look sheepish about it. “She made a very compelling argument,” he feebly tried to defend himself.

“Oh, don't you dare give me that crappy excuse!” she hissed. “You went along with what she said for an entirely different reason and we both know it!”

“And what reason would that be?” he asked a little defiantly although his discomfort was clear for all to see.

“I've seen you! Both of you!” she said with narrowed eyes. “You've been making googly eyes at each other every single time you cross paths! Don't try to deny it!”

He choked but made a quick recovery. “That had nothing to do with my decision.”

“Don't try and lie to me! You did this just to score points with her! You know, I was initially rooting for the two of you to hook up but now I take it back! She's ruining my love life and you're helping her even though you're supposed to be my friend!” She pointed a finger accusingly at him. “You're... you're... _fraternising with the enemy_!”

One of James' eyebrows arched. “I thought you were the one who kept saying I shouldn't think the worst of her?”

“That is something entirely different and what part of 'she's ruining my love life' are you refusing to acknowledge?!” she seethed. “You know what? Fine, be that way. Just know that if you ever have relationship problems with her in the future, I'm the last person you'll be able to count on for help.” With that, she stormed out and headed back to her desk to continue fuming.

Her mood only worsened when Eve showed up to tell her that she'd run into Mike and they'd ended up having lunch together which had brought up the most unpleasant feeling of deja vu. Kara couldn't hold it against her, however, especially after Eve expressed her unwavering confidence in both Mike and their relationship. It was a really nice thing to hear although Kara couldn't help but wonder if it was possible for things to get even worse than it already had.

 

* * *

 

They got worse.

Dread was now an all too familiar feeling to Kara as she opened the door of her apartment that evening and found Lena standing there.

 _What is it this time?_ , she thought to herself in despair but still summoned the mental fortitude to pretend she was pleased to see her friend. “You don't have to keep checking up on me, you know,” she said instead.

Lena gave her a reproachful look at that. “You're my best friend who happens to be in an emotionally vulnerable state right now and I want to do everything I can to help you overcome it.”

“You don't have to. Really,” Kara responded with a pained smile as she closed the door while wishing she had pretended to not be home.

“Don't be shy to ask for help, Kara,” Lena admonished her crossly. “You are in a difficult situation right now and I'm determined to be there for you every step of the way. You'll thank me in the end.”

It was becoming a real struggle to not break down right then and there. “I'm sure I'll find something to be thankful for once this is all over,” Kara mumbled under her breath in an effort to keep her spirits from sinking further into the ground.

Said efforts were immediately rendered moot following Lena's next declaration. “Now let's tackle the next step of removing Mike entirely from your life: getting rid of anything of his in your apartment.”

“What?! No!” Kara cried out in panic. Just where in the world was Lena getting all these crazy ideas from?

Her outburst predictably caused Lena to look at her strangely. “Why not? You're not saying you want to keep his stuff out of some misplaced feelings of sentimentality, are you? Or are you telling me you don't want to throw them away because you actually want him back?”

The answer to that question was a hard 'yes' but Kara knew she would only make things worse for herself if she said it. “O-O-Of course not,” she lied as she mentally scrambled for a plausible excuse, grateful for the fact that Lena was in fact terrible at picking up on her tells unlike Mon-El. “I-I was just... thinking that... it would be such a waste to just... throw everything away when I could... uh, donate it! You know, make the most of the situation?”

 _Please buy it, please buy it, please buy it_ , she mentally chanted as she sent up a prayer to Rao for this small mercy. (On second thought, why did she even bother since he clearly didn't care enough to not put her in this situation in the first place? In fact, she was pretty sure he had been laughing at her predicament since the moment it began.)

Luckily for her, Rao seemed to take pity on her this one time because Lena got a contemplative look on her face before finally nodding after a few tense seconds. “You're right. It would be a waste to just throw items like his clothes away or set them on fire.” ...When had Lena turned into a pyromaniac and just how much should she be worried about that? “Very well, charity it is. Do you want me to help you sort through his things?”

“Oh no, that won't be necessary,” Kara laughed nervously as she breathed an internal sigh of relief. “I know where everything is so it'll be faster if I do it myself. Why don't you... um, watch something while I do that?”

“If you say so,” Lena said with a small frown but did not protest as she sat down on the couch and began scanning Kara's Netflix queue.

Counting her (rather limited) blessings, Kara scurried to her bedroom and began scrambling for some kind of plan to save Mon-El's belongings from The Great Purge. Stuffing several of his shirts into a plastic bag, she hit on the idea of asking Alex for help. She could pretend that Alex was going to help donate his things to charity for her when in actuality they were just going to be stored at Alex's apartment until this whole situation got resolved... somehow. But that was a headache for another time. She had more pressing matters to attend to. Having decided on this course of action, she dialled Alex's number and quickly explained the situation to her.

Being the wonderful sister that she was, Alex's first response was to laugh very loudly into the phone.

“This isn't funny, Alex!” Kara hissed angrily. “Stop laughing!”

Unfortunately, that only made Alex laugh even more as there was a soft 'thunk' and Alex's laughter became somewhat muted, indicating that she'd dropped the phone and was likely rolling on the floor in mirth. Kara seethed quietly, all the while mentally cursing her sister in both English and Kryptonian.

After a few seconds there was a shuffling sound and Maggie's voice came through the phone. “Hi Kara. Mind telling me why your sister is imitating a hyena right now?”

Through gritted teeth, Kara found herself explaining the situation for the second time that night even as she plotted her revenge.

“...I see.” In contrast to Alex, Maggie was at least kind enough not to find her situation humorous in any way. Or at least not show it so blatantly unlike _some people_ who were _so_ going to get their ass kicked the next time she saw their stupid face. “And you need us to come over tomorrow to pick up Mon-El's stuff under the guise of donating it to charity and keep it at our place for the time being?”

“Yes please,” Kara found herself begging. “I'll pay you back for this, I swear.”

“There's no need, Kara. I'm always happy to help out a Danvers.” Maggie's tone was full of warmth. “We'll be there. I'll make sure of it even if I have to drag your sister bodily to the car.”

Kara nearly wept in gratitude. “Thank you! You're a lifesaver, Maggie!”

“No problem. Goodnight, Kara.” Just before the click that signalled the call had come to an end, Maggie could be heard saying, “Come on Danvers, enough already. If you keep laughing like that you're going to suffocate to death.”

It was in Rao's name that Kara swore vengeance, sisterly bonds be damned. _Dish best served cold._ That was the thought she consoled herself with for the time being as she quickly packed away more of Mon-El's things and took the opportunity to hide a few items here and there wherever she could. She didn't care if it was a risk; the idea of completely emptying her apartment of any trace of him felt so wrong that it manifested itself as an unpleasant sensation deep in her gut... but she didn't have time to ponder why right now.

Once she had accomplished what she'd set out to do, Kara went back to the living space to face Lena. “All done!” she announced with false cheer. “Oh, I, uh, remembered that Alex knows a place that could use Mike's things so I called her and she's agreed to pick them up tomorrow and help me drop them off.”

Luckily, Lena accepted her lie without suspecting a thing. “That's great! You have such a supportive sister, Kara. I bet you're very grateful to have her in your life.”

That statement could not be farther from the truth at that moment but all Kara could do was let out a strained laugh. “Yes, well, Alex sure is quite the sister all right.”

“Oh, speaking of tomorrow.” Lena's sudden burst of excitement, instead of being infectious, sent alarm bells ringing in Kara's head. “I've made plans for the both of us and you're going to love them.”

The relief she had felt earlier over having successfully come up with a solution to Lena's demand for a purge of Mon-El's things from her apartment died a quick but still painful death. “What... what kind of plans?” Kara asked weakly.

Grinning like a Cheshire cat, Lena said six words which sent Kara spiralling further into despair. “We're going to a singles party.”

Somewhere up above, Rao's laughter intensified.

 

* * *

 

“ _-really really sorry about this – again – but I didn't know how to say no to Lena without raising her suspicions – I know it sounds like an excuse but I couldn't think of anything and I hope you'll forgive me for that too – and I just want you to know – again – that I absolutely hate the idea because it feels like I'm cheating on you and I don't want you to feel or even think for one second that I would ever-”_

Kara's voicemail came to an abrupt end, prompting a sigh out of Mon-El as he stared at his phone's screen. She'd gone up to four this time and that had only been the second one. For a brief moment he considered calling her back to soothe her frayed nerves as best as he could and reassure her that he had complete faith in her but thought better of it when he remembered the time. Letting out another weary sigh, he sat down on an upturned crate in the alleyway behind the bar and prepared to listen to the third voicemail.

“Pardon me for eavesdropping,” a wizened voice spoke up out of nowhere, “but the young lady who left you that message sounded like she was in distress.”

Startled, Mon-El whipped his head up to find an elderly Hozz'n dressed in the traditional robes of his race staring rather calmly at him. It took him a moment to recognise the alien as the honoured guest of the wedding – Seer Hao Pham Roo, if he remembered correctly. “Uhhh... I guess you could say that,” he answered carefully.

The seer's gaze turned quizzical. “You are not going to rescue her?”

“Um...” For a brief moment, Mon-El wondered if their lives had suddenly turned into a fairytale where Kara was the princess trapped in the tower, Lena was the dragon guarding it and he was the knight set on vanquishing the beast in order to rescue his fair maiden.

...Except the princess in question was perfectly capable of rescuing herself but couldn't because doing so would expose her secret identity, the dragon was operating under the terribly false assumption that it was protecting the princess but was instead creating more problems for her and the knight was just trying to regain his normal life of living in the tower with said princess.

Okay, so maybe the fairytale analogy didn't quite work.

“It's a little more complicated than that,” he finally answered.

“Is it perhaps a matter of numbers?” the Hozz'n asked. “If you wish, I could request those inside to lend you their strength. I am sure that they will be all too willing to come to your assistance if I was the one who asked and their might will be more than sufficient to overcome whatever obstacles present themselves.”

Mon-El struggled to keep his face straight as he tried to imagine a large group of Hozz'ni gatecrashing the singles night and just how badly Kara would kick all their asses for creating so much havoc in some misguided attempt to 'rescue' her.

(Unbeknownst to him, Kara had also imagined such a scenario that night... and wished with all her heart that it would happen.)

“Uh, it's fine, really,” he tried to gently turn down the offer with a nervous smile, unsure as to where this strange generosity was coming from. “She can take care of herself and I wouldn't want to disrupt the celebrations.”

“Very well, if you insist. But should you change your mind, it would be our pleasure to assist you,” the seer said with a smile, “if for no other reason than to honour old alliances, Your Highness.”

The blood in Mon-El's veins turned to ice. “...You have me mistaken for someone else,” he lied, suddenly aware that he was alone with an alien who, despite being old, was still very much capable of causing significant bodily harm. No Hozz'n reached such an advanced age without knowing a few things about fighting, after all.

Instead of adopting a more threatening tone, however, the seer merely laughed jovially. “Ah, I suppose I should have expected this reaction. After all, it has been such a long time since we last met. Why, back then I was in the prime of my life and the strongest among the nine clans and you were so small you could have sat in my lap. In any case, I am being sincere when I say I wish you no harm, young prince.”

Allowing himself to relax just a little, Mon-El wracked his brain until the distant memories of his childhood returned to him and he finally recognised the Hozz'n standing before him as the one his parents had met long ago when they were forging new trade partnerships. “Oh,” he said rather dumbly. “Ah, it's good to see you again.”

“Likewise,” the seer replied, his voice rich with bemusement. “Although I suspect you no longer lay claim to your title judging by your reaction?”

“No. And I have no interest in ever answering to it again.” He didn't know where that left his parents in regard to who would succeed the throne after his father now but he found that he didn't care.

“I see.” The Hozz'n stroked the fur on his chin thoughtfully in the same manner a male human would his beard. “Forgive me for saying this but I find that to be a good thing. When we first met, you were spoiled – typical of a child in your position, of course – but never cruel and far from as happy as a child your age should have been. Now, you are an adult and two of those things seem to have changed for the better. Is it safe to presume that life has treated you well then?”

Mon-El thought of everything that had transpired since the day he had fled Daxam – landing in National City, meeting Kara, befriending her and everyone else, falling in love with her, finding out she returned his feelings, being with her, learning to be a superhero from her and fighting crime by her side – and could not help the smile that formed on his lips. Without being fully aware of his actions, he found himself glancing at his phone's screensaver: a candid shot Alex had taken of them during one of their double dates. In it, Kara was leaning into him in a fit of laughter as he, grinning ever so broadly, whispered some silly joke he had overheard at the bar into her ear. “Yeah, it has.”

The seer laughed long and loud. “Yes, that is the smile of someone whose life has been truly blessed! Now come! Let us return inside so you can tell me all about the one who put it on your face while you pour me a drink or three!”

 

* * *

 

Another day, another lunch hour without Mon-El. Kara wasn't sure which was louder: her despondent sighs or her stomach's angry rumbling. Sure, she could just go to Noonan's by herself and order almost everything on the menu but there was no joy to be found in that. To make matters worse, Eve had offered to have lunch with her whenever she wanted company but was unfortunately out sick that very day.

On the plus side, Lena was not around to drag her somewhere expensive to eat while she once again erroneously disparaged Mon-El to her face. Apparently L-Corp did actually need its CEO to show up every now and then. (Kara had been beginning to wonder just how Lena was able to have so much free time that she could keep coming to visit her at work and at home.)

“No offence but you look so gloomy I think there's an actual storm cloud forming over your head.”

The unexpected comment caused Kara to shoot up in her seat whereupon she found a familiar face grinning back at her. “Winn! What're you doing here?”

“Hey back at you,” he said as he stuffed his hands into his pockets. “Isn't it obvious? I'm here to take you out to lunch. Mon-El says hi, by the way. And sorry for not being able to come himself because... well, you know. Also something about you being forgiven. Or at least I think that's what he said; he kind of dozed off at the end.”

She could only imagine how tired he was and wished she could at least see him even for a bit. Although she had occasionally gone to the DEO for Supergirl-related reasons while he was there the past few days, he had been asleep and she had decided against disrupting his much-needed rest for something as silly as just... seeing him. Talking to him. Being with him. Sure, he left her voicemails too even though his were much shorter and contained less rambling compared to hers but... it wasn't the same thing. Not even close.

Shaking off the melancholic mood that was threatening to overwhelm her, she offered Winn a smile and got to her feet. “Thanks Winn. For coming here and for delivering Mon-El's message. Come on, let's go. I'm hungry already.”

“When are you not hungry?” he asked rhetorically and turned to head towards the lift when he suddenly stopped in his tracks and spun around again to face her. “Oh yeah, do you want to invite James too?”

Kara's smile turned saccharine. “Who's James? I don't know any James,” she said in a voice that was so cold she might as well have been using her freeze breath.

Winn's eyes widened as the realisation hit him. “Right... he's still dead to you because of the ban thing, huh?”

“Like I said, I don't know anyone by that name.” If life had been a comic book, Winn was sure her speech bubble would have icicles dripping from it.

“Okay...” he trailed off warily before another thought occurred to him and he positively lit up. “Wait, if he's been blacklisted while your other best friend is kind of the source of all your relationship problems right now and losing friendship points as a result, does that mean I'm your best best friend?”

She rolled her eyes as she gently guided him towards the lifts. “If you want to make this a competition then yes. Although I can think of two people who might contest that.” Then again, she wasn't exactly harbouring warm and fuzzy feelings for Alex at that moment because of last night...

“Sisters and boyfriends don't count,” Winn retorted easily with a self-satisfied grin on his face. “Hah, I'm at the top of the friendship totem pole and you can bet I'm going to hold this over James' head _forever_.”

 

* * *

 

As fun as it had been to catch up with Winn over lunch, the depressing reality of Kara's situation made itself known to her again that evening when Alex and Maggie showed up at her apartment to play their part in this entire debacle. Once again, Lena had somehow managed to find the time to show up as well so they were forced to maintain the ruse.

Alex looked positively _delighted_ about it.

Kara, on the other hand, wanted to strangle her sister.

Maggie simply stared at each of them in turn, shook her head in disbelief and walked off to grab one of the bags containing Mon-El's clothes. “I'm not getting any more involved in this insanity than I already am,” she was heard muttering under her breath as she passed by them.

“I've said this to Kara before but I think she's incredibly lucky to have such a loving and supportive sister like you in her life,” Lena all but gushed as they all slowly made their way out of Kara's apartment and downstairs to deposit Mon-El's things in Alex's car.

“Well, I do try,” Alex replied with false modesty.

Kara glared daggers into her sister's back.

“Not getting involved,” Maggie muttered to herself once again.

“I do have to say though – and I say this as the loving and supportive sister that I am,” Alex continued as she gave Kara a meaningful look, “you have such a terrible best friend. To ruin your life like this... wow.”

“Come now, Alex,” Lena chided the older Danvers sister while Kara angrily mouthed promises of retribution over Lena's shoulder from the back of the line they had formed, “you surely can't hold Kara responsible for Supergirl's transgressions. Although I didn't know you considered her a best friend, Kara.”

“Alex just exaggerates,” Kara laughed weakly as she struggled to keep a more neutral expression on her face whenever Lena happened to look her way. “Supergirl and I... um, just happen to see eye to eye on many things.”

“That doesn't change the fact that she's really messed things up for you,” Alex countered with an almost sadistic gleam in her eyes. “I mean, talk about expecting things to turn out badly in one way and then getting blindsided like this. She's more dangerous than I ever expected.”

Kara had to remind herself repeatedly that she actually loved her sister and would thus be filled with regret if she pushed her down the stairs.

“Not that any of that matters now,” Lena responded decisively as they finally reached Alex's car which had been parked nearby and took turns putting their share of Mon-El's things inside. “I'm going to be by Kara's side as she deals with all this and make sure she pulls through in the end.”

Alex clasped her now free hands on Lena's shoulders and offered her an understanding smile that was beyond theatrical. “You truly are one of a kind, Lena,” she said before making a big show of checking her watch. “Oh damn, I better leave already. Don't worry Kara; I'll make sure Mike's things end up where they're supposed to go.”

Practically spitting her thanks out, Kara made a mental note to 'forget' to buy Alex's birthday presents for the next five years and stuck to giving a grudging smile as she watched her sister and Maggie drive away. At least this meant that Mon-El's things were safe... although she wasn't so grateful that she was going to overlook all the unnecessary ribbing Alex had just put her through.

“There! Yet another thing settled with minimum fuss.” Lena declared quite cheerfully as she took Kara's hand and guided her back upstairs. “You better go pick something nice to wear and get ready. I'll go home, get changed myself and come back to pick you up so we can go to the singles night together. Cheer up, Kara! This is going to be fun!”

“I can't wait,” Kara said with all the enthusiasm of a prisoner on death row who had just been informed that his execution date had been moved forward.

 

* * *

 

The concept of 'hell' had been practically non-existent where Krypton's religious beliefs were concerned. There had for the most part only been the veneration of Rao and all the blessings he conferred upon them. Perhaps the closest thing to hell they had ever contemplated was an existence without Rao in it – an idea which had probably been too outlandish for them to even consider for very long. When Kara had first started learning about Earth's religions, she had been quite taken aback at the concept of a place of eternal suffering and had struggled to understand it for a very long time.

Now, however... now she truly understood.

 _This_ , she thought to herself, _is hell._

Unable to find a way out of attending the singles party Lena had signed her up for, she now found herself all dressed up and sitting at the bar of a classy restaurant trying to drown her sorrows. (It was moments like these that made her curse her inability to get drunk on Earth alcoholic drinks. As if that wasn't bad enough, she couldn't even bring herself to order a club soda because it made her think of Mon-El and that just made her even more miserable.)

The event was, at heart, rather simple in its concept: it was meant to be a casual one where its participants were just expected to mingle and chat with one another. The twist was that everyone had been assigned a badge with a number on it upon arriving and had to ensure that it was visible at all times in order to show that they were still 'available'. If they found someone they hit it off with and wanted to 'date' for the night, both parties would hand their badges over to one of the event coordinators present and retreat to a booth of their own where they were guaranteed some privacy.

Considering the fact that she had absolutely no interest in even being there in the first place, Kara had not budged from her seat at the bar from the moment she'd plopped down on it much less tried to speak to any of the guys present. Unfortunately for her, that did not mean that there were no guys present who hadn't noticed that she was still wearing her badge and tried to strike up a conversation. A handful of them had approached her and each one had... left an impression, to say the least.

One guy in particular had started off by boasting about the work he was doing in his robotics company which had been somewhat normal fare as far as these things were concerned... until he'd declared his intention to build a robot that looked exactly like her.

She'd barely managed to restrain herself from throwing her drink in his face and fleeing the event altogether. The only thing that had stopped her was the realisation that doing anything that drastic was bound to result in Lena coming over to check on her and all but accusing her of still being hung up on her 'ex'. It was either endure the random creep hitting on her or sit through another round of Lena badmouthing 'Mike' once again. _Yeah, I'm definitely going for the lesser of two evils_ , she decided with a grimace.

Then there were the cheesy pick-up lines. Holy Rao, the cheesy pick-up lines. Try as she might, she couldn't stop herself from hearing even the ones that hadn't actually been used on her and each one made her cringe internally. It reminded her of the time Mon-El had come across a book that had boasted of containing the best pick-up lines at a sale. He'd been so amused by the idea that he'd actually bought it and 'tried' using them on her although he'd proceeded to say each and every one of them in the most exaggerated manner possible complete with eyebrow waggling. She'd laughed so much her sides had hurt... that is, until he'd decided to get serious about seducing her ostensibly just to show her how it was supposed to be done. How that night had ended had been as predictable as it had been pleasurable.

 _And there you go thinking about him again_ , she scolded herself. _You're just making things more difficult for yourself._

In her defence, it wasn't like she could help it. Everything about this event was not only stirring up memories of her love life – or lack thereof – before Mon-El had come into the picture but also reminding her why she was so grateful for all the little things being in a relationship with him gave her. Back then, she'd had to be oh so careful about everything from what she said to how much force she put into something as simple as holding hands. (That last problem had persisted even in regard to her crush on James.)

That was the kind of normal she associated with her life as Kara Danvers... but she didn't want that. She wanted the kind of normal she had with Mon-El as Kara Zor-El.

With Mon-El, she could openly reminisce about Krypton when something reminded her of her home planet without getting a blank look or shallow expressions of sympathy in response. They could talk about their planets and cultures with the assurance that the other person would not only understand the topic but also be capable of challenging any misconceptions they had in a way that opened their eyes. (She surprised even herself every now and then such as when she found herself defending Daxam from his criticisms of his people by citing their impressive artistic talents based on pictures of a few sculptures she'd seen in the archives as something good that he could be proud of.) It was a refreshing and welcome way to remain in touch with her roots that not even Kal could offer.

Then there was the physical aspect, of course. She could kiss him without worrying about breaking his nose or entwine her fingers with his without the fear of shattering his bones. Or even do silly mundane things like swat his hand away when he playfully tried to steal her last piece of bacon without thinking twice.

 _And the sex_ , a small voice at the back of her head added. _Don't forget the sex._

 _Not. Helping_ , she mentally growled.

Glancing at her watch for the umpteenth time since the night had begun, she noted with despair that she still had one hour, 19 minutes and 24 seconds of this nightmare to endure. She wanted to be back at home with Mon-El. It didn't matter if it was watching television, reading or just talking about their day – as long as she was doing it with him, she was happy.

Of course, the fact that she couldn't be at home doing any of those things with him was kind of the problem both in terms of him being busy and the situation with Lena. Having succeeded in unceremoniously yanking herself out of her own fantasies and back to reality, she buried her head in her hands. Where were all the criminals in National City when you needed them?

“I hope you don't mind me saying this but you seem rather down.”

Startled out of her reverie, Kara looked up to find a distinguished-looking gentleman giving her a rather sympathetic smile. “Um... you could say that.”

“Would you like some company?” he offered kindly. “I've always found a good conversation to be the best cure for a bad mood.”

Oh Rao. Not again. While he seemed like a perfectly nice guy – even if he was quite a bit older than her –, she really wasn't interested and prepared to graciously decline...

...until she saw his eyes glow red for a split second.

She blinked. The gentleman continued to smile at her although now that she looked carefully, there was something strangely familiar about him. He couldn't be... could he? “...J'onn?” she whispered uncertainly.

“Why, how did you manage to guess? Yes, my name is John. John Jones,” he replied with a wink.

Kara almost laughed out loud in relief. “Oh thank god you're here. I think I could kiss you right now.” She paused. “...Wait, why _are_ you here?”

Her utterly confused expression drew a chuckle out of 'John'. “A certain someone might have mentioned your predicament this afternoon so I thought I'd check in on you just to see how you were doing myself. Looks like I made the right call.”

“I... you didn't have to,” she mumbled, flushing self-consciously. It was starting to seem like everyone in her life was getting dragged into this mess either unwittingly or of their own volition and she couldn't help but feel a little guilty.

'John' gave her a rather critical look at that which somehow made her feel even more self-conscious. “I know we say it often enough but as they say, the truth bears repeating: It's all right for you to ask for and receive help from us every now and then. You don't have to do everything by yourself.” He offered her his hand. “I'm already here; we can turn in our badges together and find somewhere quiet to talk so you won't get bothered for the rest of the night if you want.”

“...Okay,” she finally caved after struggling internally for a moment and slipped her hand into his. “Thanks, J'onn.”

Smiling warmly, he patted her hand with his free one as they walked towards the nearest event coordinator. “Anytime, Kara. Anytime.”

Kara's efforts to endure the rest of the event were much more successful after that as the two of them passed the time by talking about everything from J'onn's most recent communications with M'gann to the mischief Mon-El and Winn had caused in the past week. It was by and large an improvement over how the night had started for her.

(The downside to this solution, however, became clear once the event came to an end and J'onn left when Lena tracked her down and began teasing her about developing an interest in older men. The implications had been awkward on so many levels Kara had found herself only capable of laughing nervously before she hurriedly changed topics.)

 

* * *

 

“I,” Chon Po declared loudly as he slammed his mug down on the bar counter, “am the happiest being in all the known universe at this moment.”

Mon-El couldn't help but chuckle as he poured the incredibly jovial – and incredibly drunk – Hozz'n groom another round of Bashe wine. “I'm not going to argue with you there.”

“That is fortunate because I would have had to fight you if you had tried!” Chon Po roared in laughter although he paused after a while and got a somewhat contemplative look on his face. “Or is that unfortunate? I have not gotten into nearly enough fights yet... and it is my own wedding we are celebrating after all.”

A nervous laugh left Mon-El's lips as he mentally scrambled for a way out of his unexpected predicament. “Definitely fortunate,” he said quickly. “If we get into a fight, I can't serve you any more drinks and you... well, won't get another drink.”

The Hozz'n frowned. “That is true,” he said with grave seriousness before grinning and slamming his palm down on the bar counter with so much force his own mug rattled and some of its contents spilled out. “You are wise! Very wise indeed! Perhaps later then!”

Breathing an internal sigh of relief at having successfully avoided a minor disaster – for the time being, anyway –, Mon-El offered him a weak smile. “Yeah, maybe later. Like the last day of your wedding celebrations so I can keep serving you drinks until then.” Maybe if he plied the Hozz'n with enough drinks now, this entire thing would be forgotten by morning...

Chon Po nodded sagely and raised his mug. “To a grand finish to the happiest period of my life thus far,” he announced and finished his drink in one go before slamming the now empty mug down again. “But enough about me! What about you?”

Startled by the sudden change of topic, Mon-El found himself staring blankly at the Hozz'n in front of him for several seconds before he managed to formulate a response. “Um, what about me?”

There was an unsettling gleam in Chon Po's eyes that had nothing to do with his inebriated state. “Excuse my lack of manners but I overheard your conversation with Seer Hao Pham Roo last night. You have a mate of your own, correct?”

“Uh, yes...?” Surely this conversation wasn't heading in the direction he thought it was... was it?

His suspicions were confirmed almost immediately. “Excellent!” the Hozz'n laughed. “Does that mean that it will be your turn to... how do the humans put it... tie the knot soon enough?”

Mon-El winced. Of course. It seemed like no matter the race, happy newlyweds across the universe always started their married life by trying to push everyone around them to get hitched as soon as possible. “Um...” How was he supposed to answer that?

Chon Po frowned at him. “Why the hesitation? Is it that you have not thought about it?”

“No, no, I have,” Mon-El quickly corrected the Hozz'n.

At that, Chon Po tilted his head in confusion. “Then what is the problem?”

The problem was precisely that he had been thinking about it. A lot, in fact. One could even say that he'd been thinking about it _too_ often lately. Maybe it was because of the celebrations he was quite literally in the middle of at the moment. Every single time he caught himself thinking about it, however, he worried that it was too soon. His own people's customs were useless as a point of reference especially considering the fact that latches had been arranged and they had mostly viewed the idea of marrying for love with contempt.

Attempting to research courtships on Earth had left him even more confused than when he'd first begun with all the contradictory information and anecdotal accounts. Some couples only got hitched after several years of dating while others had 'whirlwind romances' – he wondered if a term that referenced natural disasters was supposed to be viewed positively – and got married after knowing each other for mere weeks.

Then there was the matter of the customs of Kara's people. He knew next to nothing about how Kryptonian courtships had been carried out and what they entailed. While there was the option of consulting Alura's AI, it seemed like a huge risk when he wasn't sure if Kara wouldn't be able to find out somehow. Besides, she had lived her adult life on Earth; would she even want to do things according to the ways of her people? (There was also the fact that it was really awkward to ask an AI tailored after Kara's mother such questions because it felt a lot like asking her for her daughter's hand in marriage. How would the AI respond to _that_ , he wondered?)

Of course, that headache reached new levels when it came to figuring out the right way to propose and the details of the wedding ceremony. Would she want things to be done according to Earth's customs or Krypton's? He'd entertained the idea of creating their own – a blend of Krypton's and Daxam's customs – as a reflection of how they had managed to find common ground, become friends and finally start a relationship despite their planets' bitter feud... and subsequently worried if that was overstepping a boundary he didn't know was there.

A series of sharp raps jarred him out of his thoughts and he looked up to find Chon Po eyeing him quizzically. “Are you all right?” he asked.

Mon-El offered the Hozz'n a small smile. “Just thinking,” he answered, somewhat grateful that Chon Po had only tapped the bar counter to get his attention instead of reaching over to shake him. By Hozz'n standards, it was actually quite polite.

Chon Po grinned conspiratorially at him. “About your mate, perhaps?”

“You could say that,” Mon-El replied ruefully. He had to keep reminding himself that thinking about such matters was incredibly premature especially when he wasn't entirely sure whether Kara would even say yes. She still tensed up a little – impossible to notice unless you paid extremely close attention – whenever he said a certain three-word phrase, for one, and there was the fact that she'd yet to say it herself. However, he refrained from letting it weigh on his mind; she was, by her own admission, not entirely fond of being vulnerable and if saying “I love you” the first time had been difficult for him, he couldn't imagine how much she was likely struggling with it.

But that was okay.

It didn't matter how long it took whether it was hearing her say those three words or potentially getting married to her in the distant future. It didn't scare him that he was thinking about spending the rest of his life with her even with the knowledge that the yellow sun was going to grant them immensely long lives.

As long as they were together, he was happy.

“Haha!” For the second time in about as many minutes, Chon Po brought him out of his musings. “If you are thinking about her now of all times, then surely the day that you will experience the unrivalled happiness I am currently enjoying is close at hand! You must invite us when that day comes! I will repay your excellent service now by showing you how to _really_ celebrate then!”

All thoughts of his relationship with Kara, both the melancholic and pleasant ones, immediately fled Mon-El's mind as he began envisioning just how much chaos an entire clan of Hozz'ni would cause on his hypothetical wedding day. Horror did not even begin to describe how he was feeling as he hurriedly tried to come up with a way to politely decline the most unwelcome offer.

 

* * *

 

Being miserable was starting to feel like her new default state and waking up on Saturday morning to an empty apartment did nothing to change that sentiment. If not for the whole mess that had started the night of the charity gala, Mon-El could have been getting his much-needed rest here at home instead of at the DEO. She would have been able to fuss over him, make sure that he was comfortable and maybe even indulge herself a little by staying in bed with him for as long as possible until some emergency demanded her attention.

Except he couldn't ostensibly even come within a five mile radius of her apartment because Lena might see him and do some other drastic thing like file a restraining order against him on her behalf.

She groaned as she sank into the couch and buried her face in her hands. It had been days and she still had trouble trying to figure out how the hell everything had spiralled out of control to such an insane degree.

 _I wish Mon-El was here_ , she thought to herself mournfully.

The sound of keys jingling outside her apartment reached her ears just then and Kara looked up to see her front door swing open and none other than Mon-El walk right in.

She blinked.

He was still there.

Then she pinched herself just to be sure.

Nope, he really was there. She wasn't hallucinating or having some fever dream brought about by missing him too much. Maybe Rao had been listening to her prayers at that very moment? (Unlike almost every other time in the past few days, that is.)

On his end, Mon-El took a moment to realise she was sitting there staring at him – which, she supposed, was excusable considering he looked like he was almost literally dead on his feet – but managed to offer her a tired smile once his brain registered her presence. “Oh. Hey Kara.” He paused to crack a large yawn. “Sorry, I ran out of clean clothes at the DEO and thought I'd just drop in real quick to pick some up. I know Alex is keeping most of my stuff for me but her place is so much farther and I was hoping you still had at least a few shirts I could take. I mean, it's not like I can wear my DEO shirts outside of the DEO after all. Um, I'm not interrupting anything, am I?”

While he had been talking, Kara had taken the opportunity to study him. His hair was adorably dishevelled, his neatly trimmed stubble from several days ago had grown out into a full-fledged beard as a result of not being able to ask for her help in shaving it and his plaid button-up shirt was rather crumpled and only half tucked in.

In short, he looked incredibly, unbelievably _hot_.

So she did what any sane woman would do when her incredibly, unbelievably hot boyfriend _who was totally not her ex because she certainly never broke up with him thank you very much_ showed up at her doorstep after they had both gone for several days without seeing each other.

She got up, marched right over to him and grabbed the collar of his shirt with both hands so she could yank his head down to her level and smash her lips against his.

Mon-El's muffled noise of surprise was drowned out by the sound of her own loud moan as she relished in the taste and feel of him. Rao, she'd missed him – missed this – so much there were no words to even describe it. Want and need blended into one another as she deepened the kiss and began tugging him in the direction of the bedroom. The suddenness and roughness of her actions threw him off balance and he flailed his arms somewhat comically for a moment before he quickly regained his equilibrium and dutifully followed her lead.

It seemed like an eternity before Kara felt the back of her legs bump into her bed and she mentally gave thanks to whichever deity was listening. By that point, she'd managed to unbutton his shirt despite a lot of fumbling due to her haste and thrown it who knew where. Not like it mattered right now; there were more important and urgent things that required her attention. Like getting the rest of his clothes off. Even with that goal in mind, however, she let herself get distracted by the simple thrill of running her hands listlessly all over his bare chest and shoulders. Rao, she'd _really_ missed him.

Meanwhile, Mon-El had moved at a more sedate pace – understandable considering he was already quite exhausted – but still managed to keep up with her, having managed to take advantage of one of the times they'd had to part for air to tug her shirt off as well. His fingers had only just found the clasp of her bra when she dragged him down with her onto the mattress and the increased amount of skin contact which had resulted from them quite literally tumbling into bed half-dressed – or half-undressed, to be more accurate – drew protracted groans of pleasure from both of them. Impatient with desire, Kara slid her hands down his chest and began working to get his jeans off-

Her phone rang.

“Mmph.” It was Mon-El who broke the kiss, surprisingly enough. “Kara.”

“Ignore it,” she panted and made the strategic decision to temporarily halt her endeavours to divest him of his jeans in favour of dragging his head back down.

Once again, Mon-El did something shocking and resisted her efforts to resume kissing him. “Kara, it could be important.”

It took all of her self-restraint – whatever was left of it anyway – not to growl in frustration. Why was he being so... so... _responsible_?! Wasn't he a Daxamite?!

“Fine. Fine!” Having no choice but to concede, she released him and reached for her phone which was still cheerfully ringing away on her bedside table.

The moment she saw the name on the caller ID, however, she had to fight the overwhelming urge to throw the device into the sun.

“...Well,” Mon-El said as he eyed her phone's screen, sounding quite breathless and equally resigned, “I guess we're not getting any further than this.”

With that, he reluctantly rolled off her and this time she really did growl in frustration. Nevertheless, she decided that she was going to be calm and act normal when she answered the phone. Sitting up and taking a deep breath, she told herself to say something that conveyed casual and pleasant surprise and would thus not raise any suspicions.

Then she pressed the 'answer' button and all but screamed, “What?!”

...Which was basically the exact opposite of what she had told herself to say mere seconds ago.

“Kara?” Lena's worried voice came through the speaker as Kara facepalmed. “Is everything all right?”

 _Deep breaths, Kara, deep breaths._ “Yeah. Yeah, I'm fine. Just... a little frustrated.” Which was the understatement of the century.

“What's the matter? Anything I can help with?” Lena asked, her concern clear in her voice.

Oh, where to even begin... “No. Like I said, it's fine,” she lied. “I just... lost something.” _Mostly my general peace of mind. And my love life. Also my sex life while we're on the subject. Which is kind of your fault and you're kind of happy about it because you thought you were doing me a favour but it's all just a kind of really big misunderstanding on your part that I can't correct._ “Nothing you need to worry about.”

“If you say so...” Lena trailed off doubtfully. “Anyway, I was calling to ask if you had any plans for today.”

 _Not any more I don't_ , Kara thought in despair. “No... what do you have in mind?”

“Well, I just thought that you might need some company and enjoy some leisure time somewhere nice instead of being alone in your apartment on a weekend. How about it?”

“Sure,” Kara answered helplessly, seeing no way out of her predicament once again.

“Fantastic!” Lena's excitement was sadly not contagious. “I'm only a few minutes away from your place so get ready; I'll pick you up and we can go somewhere fun.”

“Okay. See you then,” Kara replied before pressing the 'end call' button.

Then she let her phone clatter to the floor and buried her face in her hands.

She wanted to cry. Or scream. Possibly both.

There was a slight dip in the bed and then a familiar pair of hands was massaging the tension out of her shoulders. Which felt nice and all but she really wished they were doing a lot more than just that right now.

“Guess I'd better go before Lena finds me here,” Mon-El sighed.

“You probably should,” she said even though it was the last thing she wanted. At this point she was almost willing to throw caution to the wind even if it meant Lena walking in on them having sex.

Sanity sadly prevailed, however, and she followed him as he got out of bed and they both retrieved their shirts and got dressed again. (His had landed on the television while hers had somehow wound up on the kitchen counter which was at least better than them having tossed either article of clothing out the open window by accident. That would've been a little hard to explain.)

“Hey.”

Kara snapped out of her admittedly pointless musings and glanced up to find Mon-El looking at her with an encouraging if tired smile. “What is it? Oh right, you came for fresh clothes. Hang on, I kept some of them for... well. I'll get them.” Unsure how to explain her insistence on having a few of his things remain in her apartment despite the risks, she sped back into her bedroom to retrieve a few of them and put them in a spare gym bag she'd gotten as a free gift before speeding back and handing it over. “Here. This should last you for a while.”

“Thanks,” he chuckled as he accepted the bag and slung it over his shoulder, “but that was kind of the second topic I was going to bring up before I left.”

She blinked owlishly at him. “What was the first?”

“Just this.” He stepped closer and cradled her face so he could give her a soft sweet kiss. “We'll figure something out, okay?” he murmured once they broke apart. “I'm not really up for any brainstorming right now but I know we'll find a way to get out of this mess soon enough. We've overcome worse after all.”

Sighing, she closed her eyes and savoured the feel of his touch for as long as possible. “I know,” she whispered back. “Still doesn't make it any easier to deal with right now though.”

“That makes two of us, I think,” he replied wryly and seemed about to say more when their little bubble was burst by the sound of knocking on the door. “That's my cue to leave. You sure you're going to be okay?”

“I'll be fine,” she reassured him even if she didn't quite feel like that was true. “Like you said, we've overcome worse.”

There was another round of knocking.

They sighed as one and Mon-El stole another kiss before reluctantly stepping away from her. “I'll see you at the DEO then,” he said before leaping out the window.

“Yeah, see you there,” she murmured more to herself than anything although she was sure her words had managed to reach his ears anyway thanks to his enhanced hearing.

It wasn't the same though. The DEO was their workplace. She wanted him here – at home. With her.

Thinking about it, however, wasn't going to get her anywhere so Kara let out another forlorn sigh as she dragged herself to her front door and mentally prepared herself for an entire day of pretending she didn't want to just mope alone in her apartment. Strange how that was completely in line with the sentiments she would likely be having if Lena's misunderstanding of the situation was actually the truth.

 

* * *

 

Mon-El let out an involuntary groan as he all but collapsed on his bed in his room at the DEO. Exhausted didn't even begin to describe his current state; he'd been pretty worn out by the time his shift had ended and the little misadventure in Kara's apartment had sapped whatever energy he had left after that. As it was, he couldn't be sure that he wasn't going to just slip into a coma the moment he closed his eyes.

 _One more night_ , he reminded himself. _Just one more night of this insanity._

What happened after that, however, was up in the air. The situation with Lena still hadn't been resolved and as long as that was the case, he couldn't go back to living with Kara much less be seen in public with her... or at least by one specific person. The only place that seemed to be safe from Lena's laser gaze was the DEO and that didn't seem like the best place to be doing anything remotely couple-y.

A yawn escaped him, interrupting his train of thought, and he decided to give up trying to figure out a solution to their predicament while he was so far gone both physically and mentally. Just as he was about to close his eyes and let the darkness claim him, however, the sound of the door to his room opening reached his ears and he cracked his eyes open to find Winn's head hovering in the doorway.

“Hey buddy,” the DEO's resident tech genius greeted him with a smile as he entered the room and shut the door behind him. “Sorry, did I wake you?”

“No, no, I was just about to fall asleep.” Mon-El struggled to sit up as he tried to shake off his drowsiness. “Did you need something?”

“Nothing really,” Winn assured him hastily. “You need your rest so I'll leave you alone. I just wanted to see how you were doing.”

“You sure? I mean-” Mon-El cracked another yawn. “I'm not the best conversationalist right now but my ears still work.”

“Yeah, somehow I get the feeling I'll just be telling you a bedtime story,” Winn teased good-naturedly. “Seriously, Mon-El. Get some sleep. You look like you really need it.”

Mon-El blinked slowly and stared blearily at Winn for a moment before nodding. “Okay. Goodnight then,” he mumbled before lying back down on his bed. He was out in seconds.

Winn sighed as he watched his dozing friend for a moment. Everything about Kara's and Mon-El's situation sucked but what sucked even more was the fact that he couldn't do anything to help them directly. All he could do was hope they found a way out of it eventually and check in on them every now and then. He shook off his sudden bout of melancholy; now was not the time.

He cast another glance at Mon-El's slumbering form and decided it was time to leave considering he didn't think staring at his friend while he slept was something he wanted to turn into a hobby. “Sweet dreams buddy,” he whispered and turned to leave-

-only to jump out of his skin when he found Alex standing less than a foot away.

“Winn,” Alex addressed him in an utterly casual manner like it was completely normal for them to run into each other in Mon-El's room as she sidestepped him and barely missed hitting him with...

He blinked.

“Sun lamps?” he blurted out confusedly.

Alex, for her part, saw no need to answer as she plugged the two lamps she'd brought with her into the nearby sockets and angled them so they were aimed directly at the unconscious Daxamite. “Winn?”

“Yeah?” he squeaked. He recognised that tone.

“If you tell anyone this was my doing, you're going to regret it, okay?” Coming from Alex, it was a promise. “I still have a reputation to maintain, after all.”

“Yeah. Sure. Okay,” he babbled and nodded his head vigorously.

“Good.” Satisfied with her handiwork, she began ushering him out the door. “Let's get out of here and get back to work. He needs his sleep.”

 

* * *

 

Kara never thought she would be thankful for potentially catastrophic industrial accidents but considering almost everything else in her life had been turned upside down the past few days, why not this sentiment too? Then again, it really was unbecoming of a superhero to wish for a disaster to happen just so she could distract herself from the messed up situation that was her personal life. Having said that, however...

She eyed the logo adorning the side of the electronics factory she had just prevented from burning to the ground. Of course it had to be an L-Corp factory. It felt like Lena was haunting her even in this aspect of her life as well... which, in a way, was kind of fitting considering the misunderstanding which had kicked everything off involved Supergirl.

“I thought I might find you here.”

_...No. Please no._

There it was again: that familiar feeling of dread. Ever so slowly, Kara turned around where she was hovering in the air to find none other than one Lena Luthor looking up at her with a mixture of anger and contempt shining in her eyes.

_Why, Rao, why?!_

(Kara felt like if she concentrated hard enough, she could almost hear him laughing.)

“Lena!” she managed to get out despite the sudden dryness of her throat. “What are you doing here?”

“It is my factory, after all,” Lena pointed out. “But more importantly, I wanted to speak to you.”

“You do?” Kara asked as she fought to keep her voice at an even pitch. “Ah, about what exactly?”

Lena's glare intensified. “Don't play dumb. This is about your little affair with Mike Matthews – Kara Danvers' now thankfully ex-boyfriend – and you know it.”

Kara inwardly cringed, incredibly grateful it was late at night and there was no one else around to hear this conversation. “Look, Lena-”

“I can't believe I respected you,” Lena bit out. “Here I was, a Luthor trying to salvage my family name and looking to you for inspiration... only for you to turn out to be someone that was capable of such a despicable act as stealing someone else's boyfriend... and a friend's at that.”

At that point, Kara felt her self-control snap. She'd had enough. This ended now. She was going to just tell Lena right this second that she and Kara Danvers were one and the same and deal with the consequences later. Right now, she just wanted to put an end to this insanity. Having made her albeit rash decision, she opened her mouth to spill her secret-

“And what about that companion of yours? I've seen the pictures. You're cheating on him with Mike, aren't you? As if I couldn't lose any more respect for you.”

-only for the words to die on her lips upon hearing Lena's accusation.

...What?

“What pictures?” Kara blurted out confusedly instead even as she felt like she was going to regret asking that question.

“Oh, don't pretend like you don't know about the gossip sites and how your fans try to track your every move,” Lena snarled. “Everyone's been speculating that your relationship with the guy who's been spotted with you lately is more than just a crime-fighting partnership.”

At that, Kara's brain stalled as it tried to process several bombshells at once.

One: There were gossip sites and fans that speculated about Supergirl's love life like she was a celebrity and, having managed to snap photos of Mon-El in his DEO uniform, had (accurately) deduced they were in a romantic relationship.

Two: Lena somehow had the time to visit these gossip sites and scroll through Rao knew how many of her fans' social media accounts. (No, really, exactly how easy was it to run a multimillion-dollar company if she had this much free time?)

Three: Not only did Lena think that Mike Matthews – otherwise known as Mon-El – was cheating on Kara Danvers with Supergirl – who was Kara Danvers, in case that needed to be pointed out – but she also thought that Supergirl was cheating on Mon-El... with Mike Matthews. Who, in case it needed to be pointed out, was Mon-El.

It was at that point that her brain threw in the towel and boarded the next spacecraft headed for the other end of the universe.

“I can't deal with this,” she muttered and flew straight home while pointedly ignoring Lena's furious yells for her to come back and answer for her supposed transgressions. The moment she arrived back at her apartment, she changed into her pyjamas and dialled Mon-El's number so she could vent via voicemail about the latest bout of insanity Lena had succumbed to even as she cursed herself for not having any alien alcohol on hand because she _really_ needed to get drunk right now.

Of course, that was far from the end of her troubles that night as it was not long before a rapid series of knocks on her front door reached her ears.

She didn't have to use her X-ray vision to know who was on the other side.

“Thank goodness you're still awake,” Lena said without preamble as she marched straight in the moment Kara opened the door. “You wouldn't believe who I had a little chat with just now.”

“Oh, I think I can believe it,” Kara mumbled under her breath as she resigned herself to a new helping of misery courtesy of her 'best friend'.

And so Kara found herself subjected to a long tirade which consisted entirely of Lena disparaging her own superhero identity to her face occasionally with the help of some very colourful language. Throughout the ordeal, she found herself thinking that whatever Mon-El was currently dealing with at the Hozz'ni wedding celebrations could not possibly be worse than what she was being forced to endure right now.

 

* * *

 

“For... the... last... time... I... was... not... making... eyes... at... your... daughter!” Mon-El grunted, punctuating every word with his fists as he tried to punch the irate Hozz'n currently attempting to maul him to death into unconsciousness.

“Are you saying I'm unattractive?!” the female Hozz'n in question roared as she sprang to her feet and charged.

“What?! No, I-”

The rest of his denial escaped his lips in the form of a pained wheeze when the younger Hozz'n tackled him to the ground and knocked all the air out of his lungs. Breathless and dazed, Mon-El was unable to stop himself from feeling a little envious of Kara and how she must be having a nice relaxing Saturday night at that very moment.

 

* * *

 

Needless to say, they were both dead wrong.

Rao just laughed harder.

 

* * *

 

It was a sunny and carefree Sunday morning.

The same words unfortunately could not be used to describe Kara's mood.

The Hozz'ni wedding celebrations had finally come to an end last night which meant that Mon-El was free at long last from that brand of lunacy... but not the one Lena had ensnared both of them in for the past few days. Until and unless that was resolved, he had to keep staying at the DEO instead of coming home and they couldn't go back to their normal lives. No home-cooked meals, no cuddling on the couch watching television, no relaxing while talking about everything and nothing in particular or just reading quietly, no lunch dates – she spared a moment to curse James again – and last but not least, _no sex_.

She was nearing her breaking point.

Even so, here she was in her super-suit sitting in one of the unoccupied chairs in the DEO command centre with her head buried in her arms and torturing herself by listening to Mon-El talk to Winn about the latest video game releases just down the hallway instead of being in the room with them. Kara was very sure that in her current state of mind, she was going to just jump him right then and there without sparing a thought about her surroundings the moment she laid eyes on him. So what if she traumatised Winn in the process and he never spoke to either of them ever again? Or they got scolded by J'onn and forced to see Pam in HR about having sexual relations in the workplace? She had _needs_ , damnit.

(Unbeknownst to her, every DEO agent had been giving her a wide berth the moment she'd arrived. The aura of misery and frustration – mostly sexual in nature – surrounding her was _that_ palpable.)

It had occurred to her several times in the past few days that there was in fact a clear-cut solution to their predicament but she found herself unable to consider it without a ton of trepidation. What had happened between Kal and Lex was proof enough of how badly things could go if and when Lena found out she was Supergirl... and yet it seemed like there really was no other plausible option that didn't involve absurdly drastic measures.

“You could actually spend time with Mon-El right now if you want, you know.”

At the sound of J'onn's voice, Kara lifted her head and found the Green Martian looking down at her with a sympathetic expression on his face.

“Believe me, I want to,” she replied wearily, “but I don't think I should.”

One of his eyebrows arched. “Why?”

...Was there a way to answer that without embarrassing herself so utterly that she would never be able to look him in the eye again? “Um...” she stalled for as long as she could before her mind cooked up a plausible excuse. “I'm expecting Lena to call any second to force me to go out and do something fun to get over my supposed ex-boyfriend or something so...” Come to think of it, that was probably what was going to happen any minute now so it wasn't technically a lie...

“If you want, I can run interference for you again,” he offered kindly.

She sighed. “Thanks, J'onn but I don't see how-”

The rest of her sentence died on her lips when J'onn's form shifted and she found herself looking at a perfect copy of Kara Danvers, glasses and all.

“I think someone's forgetting that I've helped her like this before,” he said wryly – with her voice, even – before he shifted back and held out a hand palm up. “Come on, hand over your phone and go home with Mon-El. I'll keep Lena occupied and away from your apartment today for you.”

She bit her lip. The offer was so tempting... “But... I mean... aren't you needed here in case there's an emergency? What if Supergirl is needed?”

“What am I, chopped liver?” Alex complained as she walked up to them. “I think I've proven myself to be a very competent second-in-command who can hold the fort when J'onn's not around, thank you very much. And for the record, we're perfectly capable of getting by without Supergirl for at least one day.”

“Well, that covers it,” J'onn noted with amusement, glancing between both Danvers sisters. “So what do you say?”

“Okay, okay!” Kara caved and all but leapt to her feet to wrap her arms around him. “Thanks, J'onn.”

“You're welcome, Kara,” he replied fondly as he mirrored the gesture.

Alex was about to playfully protest her sister's lack of appreciation for her own contribution when she found herself being enveloped in a hug next. “You're welcome too,” she said with a smile on her face.

“Don't think I've forgiven you for the other two days,” Kara mumbled although her threat was half-hearted at best.

“I'm quaking in my combat boots,” Alex snarked good-naturedly. “Now go fetch your boyfriend and get out of here.”

Kara didn't need to be told twice. She dropped her phone on the table and both J'onn and Alex watched her become a blur of red and blue as she supersped out of the command room and down the hallway.

“Hi Winn!” “Hey!” “Wha-” “Sorry Winn!” “What the-” “Whoa!” “Bye Winn!”

Both of them listened to the commotion while sporting matching bemused smirks and watched as the same blur of red and blue – this time with a figure clad in grey and black in its arms – flew past them and out the balcony.

Not ten seconds later, Winn came marching into the command centre, his shirt stained with coffee and a peeved look on his face.

“Who do I talk to around here about an assault and kidnapping case?” he demanded.

Alex couldn't help it; she laughed.

 

* * *

 

It would likely surprise anyone if she told them about it but watching Mon-El sleep was a rare luxury these days. For someone who had likely spent his whole life on Daxam getting out of bed past noon, he had adjusted pretty quickly to rising at a decent hour once he'd started working aside from the times when the odd hours of his job made it impossible to do so. Kara lamented the fact that she'd failed to fully appreciate it during the early days of their relationship when she was the one to wake up first and he didn't have an early shift at the bar. Now that he'd basically made it his life's mission to make breakfast for her every morning, those opportunities were few and far between.

So she curled up against him and savoured this moment for as long as she could.

After what seemed like an hour but was probably no more than half that, Mon-El stirred and rejoined her in the waking world.

“Hi,” he mumbled with a drowsy smile on his face, his blue-grey eyes half-lidded and his voice scratchy with sleep.

“Hi,” she murmured back with a smile of her own as she let him pull her even closer by the waist. Contented didn't even begin to describe how she was feeling right now.

“So... I have a question,” he said.

Her smile slipped just a little. “What is it?” she asked warily. The glint that had appeared in his eyes spelled nothing but trouble.

Sure enough, he proved her suspicions right with his next words. “Who exactly did I have sex with just now?”

She groaned and buried her face in his shoulder.

“It's a serious question!” he insisted even as his cheeky grin betrayed him. “I mean, it was Supergirl who kidnapped me but here we are in Kara Danvers' apartment and I'd just like some clarification. Is this a continuation of a sordid affair or make-up sex? Or a scandalous new twist in the story? Which wouldn't surprise me at this point because it's getting really hard to keep track of the narrative.”

“Don't tease me,” she whined as she smacked his chest in an effort to get him to stop.

“I'm not!” he denied but contradicted himself by laughing as he said it. “For that matter, who am I right now, Mike Matthews or Supergirl's mysterious crime-fighting partner? You know, Winn's still struggling to come up with a superhero name for me; he pitched Superboy at the start but we both agreed it might make things kind of confusing for people. The furthest we've gotten so far is that it should sound courageous...”

Sensing that he was going to keep going unless she actually responded definitively, she huffed and lifted her head to look him in the eyes. “How about this narrative?” she offered exasperatedly. “We're just Kara Zor-El and Mon-El and neither of us cheated or broke up with one another. Okay?”

To her relief, his smile lost its mischievous edge and turned soft again. “Works for me,” he whispered before kissing her. “So... not that I mind staying in bed with you but did you actually have any plans for how you wanted to spend the day?”

Just then, her stomach decided to take part in the conversation by rumbling audibly and she failed to stop herself from blushing just a little even as she valiantly tried to play it off. “Well, you could cook something for me...” she suggested casually.

“Oh, I see how it is,” he responded with a look of mock hurt and pressed a hand to his chest as if she'd physically wounded him. “The sex was just a ploy to get me to feed you, wasn't it?”

She burst into a fit of giggles at that. “Come on, you know that's not true!” she managed to get out through her laughter. “Besides, I deserve some pity here. I had to survive on cereal and takeout the whole time you weren't around,” she said as she pouted and gave him her best puppy dog eyes. “ _Cereal_ , Mon-El! It was torture after so many mornings of eating the breakfasts you make for me.”

“So it's my fault you're spoiled rotten?” he complained with exaggerated outrage. “I cook a few meals for you and now I'm trapped in eternal servitude as your personal chef?”

“Yes,” she answered readily and shamelessly with an unrepentant grin on her face. “Can I get fed now?”

“Fine,” he pretended to concede with great reluctance and dropped a kiss on her forehead. “But only because I can't say no to you. And after I've taken a shower. You still have some of my clothes, right?”

She had in fact still held on to a few articles of his clothing and after they'd both showered and gotten dressed Mon-El kept his promise by whipping up a batch of fried rice which they ate with the leftovers of her last takeout order. (When asked about it, she'd shyly admitted to sticking to their usual order and being unable to bring herself to finish everything without him there and was grateful when he declined to comment.)

Throughout the meal, they took turns filling each other in about the events of the past few days which they'd left out of their voicemails such as his unexpected reunion with a long-forgotten acquaintance from his distant past. The conversation flowed freely and continued without many pauses in-between even as they finished their meals and began washing the dishes.

Relaxed, carefree and happy to have things back to normal especially where her relationship with Mon-El was concerned, Kara found herself thinking just how much she wanted more days like today. While it was true that they'd enjoyed moments like this before where everything was peaceful and free of troubles, the craziness of the past few days had made her truly acknowledge and appreciate just how happy he made her.

In that very moment, she knew she wanted this – them – to last forever.

“I love you.”

The statement had seemingly materialised out of thin air and she found herself wondering who had said it even as Mon-El froze in the middle of putting the last of the cutlery away. Ever so slowly, he turned his head to look at her, mouth hanging open and eyes wide with shock.

She stared back at him, unable to figure out why he was gaping at her like that.

Then she realised that she'd been the one who had spoken those three little words.

“Um...” At a complete loss for words, Mon-El struggled to find something to say. “What?”

Suddenly self-conscious, Kara felt her cheeks heat and let her gaze dart everywhere but his face as she summoned the courage to repeat something she had somehow clearly had no trouble saying the first time. “I love you,” she managed to mumble, shuffling nervously where she stood. “I know I should've said it before but...”

“...you don't like being vulnerable,” he finished for her with a smile, having finally regained his own ability to speak. “That's... that's okay. I-I'm just... really glad to hear it. I mean,” he winced, “not that I doubted how you felt, that is. Sorry, I didn't mean to imply-”

“Mon-El.” She walked up to him and cut him off by pressing a finger to his lips. “I know what you meant. You don't have to apologise.”

“...Okay,” he sighed after he pulled her hand away from his mouth and pressed a kiss against her palm. “Can I just say something though?”

Kara rolled her eyes as she wrapped her arms around his neck while he pulled her close. “What is it?” she humoured him even though she was pretty sure she already knew what he was going to say.

“I love you too.” His smile was like the morning sun.

She let out a snort of laughter despite herself. He really was that predictable. “I already knew _that_ , silly.”

“Yes, but what you don't know is that I love you more,” he grinned.

“You can't seriously be trying to turn this into a competi- _Mon-El_!” she squealed in surprise when he picked her up without warning and began carrying her to the bedroom. (Their laughter and the wideness of their smiles made kissing a little more difficult than usual but in the end, they managed just fine.)

 

* * *

 

“I'm going to tell her.”

It had been a satisfyingly unproductive Sunday as they'd enjoyed lazing around the house, taking a well-deserved nap and at the most doing a bit of laundry. Now they were curled up together on the couch after having eaten an incredibly delicious dinner – courtesy of Mon-El, of course – and getting ready to catch up on some of their shows with Kara having draped her legs over Mon-El's lap in such a way that she was practically sitting in it.

Her out-of-the-blue statement caused him to drag his gaze away from the television screen and direct it at her. “Tell who what?” he asked even though he had a rough idea what she meant by that announcement.

“Lena,” she clarified, confirming his suspicions. “I'm going to tell her I'm Supergirl.”

Recognising the seriousness of the impending discussion, he grabbed the remote and switched off the television so he could give her his undivided attention. “Seems like a very important decision,” he commented carefully. “Can I ask what spurred you to make it?”

“You know.” She waved her hand in the air absently. “This whole situation. I've been thinking about it for the past few days and telling her is the only solution I can come up with that isn't overly drastic or insane.”

He frowned. “If this is about me being inconvenienced by the whole thing, I want you to know I'm fine with it. Well, I mean I'll live basically. It's your secret – one of your biggest and most important ones at that – and I don't think I should be a factor when you're deciding who to tell.”

“Mon-El, we're in this together. Of course you should be a factor,” she chided him. “Our relationship is a big part of my life and I want to be able to go out with you everywhere without sneaking around and worrying if Lena's going to see us. Plus, what kind of girlfriend would I be if I just let you suffer through having not only your life disrupted but also your reputation dragged through the mud when I can do something about it?”

“I just don't want you to end up regretting it,” he confessed quietly as he cast his gaze downwards. “You keep your identity a secret for a reason and the blame will be mine if and when things go wrong in the future because of this.”

“Hey.” She placed a hand on his cheek in an effort to coax him to meet her gaze and smiled softly at him when he did. “I won't regret it, okay? No matter what. And as for potential doomsday events in the future, we'll cross those bridges when we get to them. Together.”

“...Okay,” he whispered and returned her smile as he closed the gap between them to kiss her. (The sensation of his beard tickling her skin was still rather new and while she was still adjusting to it, she found she was taking quite a liking to it.)

“Actually,” she said when they parted, “I should probably ask you if _you're_ okay with my decision. Your secret's going to get exposed in the process after all since we'll also have to tell her you're Supergirl's mysterious crime-fighting partner... and an alien.”

He shrugged casually. “It's fine. I mean, Lena only knows me as Kara Danvers' boyfriend after all. I don't think telling her who I am will change much between us.”

“That's the other reason I decided to finally tell her, actually,” she admitted somewhat guiltily. “I call her one of my best friends but she's the only one who still doesn't know my secret. I mean, it's not like I was going to just tell her the moment we became friends but it's been months and here I am still keeping her in the dark about a big part of my life.”

“I'm sure she'll understand,” he was quick to reassure her. “Everyone knows what happened between your cousin and her brother. It's only logical that you'd be hesitant about the possibility of history repeating itself.”

“If you say so,” she replied although she didn't sound fully convinced. There was a long pause as she bit her lip and visibly struggled with what she wanted to say next before she finally blurted out her thoughts. “I think I understand now. As in _really_ understand.”

Mon-El blinked at her confusedly. “Understand what?”

She became oddly fascinated with an invisible stain on the blue blanket covering them. “Why you didn't tell me who you really were at the start.”

“Kara-” he started to say something but she barrelled on.

“I treated you horribly the moment I learned you were a Daxamite; I can't even imagine how much worse I would've acted if I'd known you were the crown prince from the beginning. I mean, look how I behaved when I found out the truth,” she pointed out, her voice rich with self-recrimination. “You were just afraid of how I'd react and then I proved you had every right to think that.”

“Hey, I thought we'd gotten past that already,” he said somewhat reproachfully. “I promised not to lie to you ever again and we both apologised to each other and agreed to discuss our problems like adults in the future. You and Lena will be able to work things out just like we did. Your friendship's built to last after all.”

“I think you're more confident about this than I am,” she sighed. “That settles it then. I'll tell her tomorrow night. Can you be here when I do? I want to clear your name at the same time and... well, I could use the support.”

“Of course,” he agreed readily. “I have to go in during the day and help with the clean-up but we should be done with at least most of it by the afternoon. I'll be here.”

“Thanks,” she said and kissed him in gratitude. “I just want this to be over and done with as soon as possible. Then we can put all this insanity behind us and go back to our normal lives.”

“I look forward to that too,” he echoed her sentiments with a smile. “How about we finish off a couple of episodes and head to bed? I have a feeling we're going to need the rest.”

“Sounds good.” With that, she snuggled deeper into his body as he switched the television back on and hit 'play'.

A few minutes passed before Mon-El spoke up again.

“So does this mean you're ready to forgive Ja-”

“ _Hell. No._ ”

 

* * *

 

Monday arrived and Kara faced it with as much courage as she could muster. The plan was simple enough: send Lena a message asking her to come over in the evening, wait for Mon-El to come home and then wait together for Lena to arrive so they could reveal the truth to her. She just hoped everything went smoothly.

“What the hell is he doing here?!” Lena had demanded the moment she'd laid eyes on Mon-El.

Kara winced. So much for that. “Lena, please calm down.”

“No, I will not calm down!” Lena fired back. “Kara, please tell me you didn't forgive this cheating jerk and take him back!”

For his part, Mon-El remained completely silent and still, suddenly afraid that making any sudden movements would cause Lena to leap at him and try to strangle him to death.

Feeling a headache coming on, Kara massaged her forehead. “I didn't. Mostly because he never cheated on me and I never broke up with him in the first place.”

Lena stared at her incredulously. “But I saw-”

“You saw him with me,” Kara cut her off and took advantage of Lena's shock to undo her ponytail, take off her glasses and start hovering several inches in the air in one swift move. “I'm Supergirl.”

Silence.

Lena's eyes bugged out and her jaw looked like it was in danger of becoming unhinged and falling to the floor. Sensing the possibility of a fainting episode, Mon-El hurriedly grabbed the nearest chair and pushed it behind her.

Kara determined then and there that it had been a good idea to keep the reveal simple instead of dramatic as she lowered herself back down and planted her feet firmly on the floor again. “I've been meaning to tell you for a while now but never found what I felt was the right time to do it.” She spared a glance at Mon-El who nodded encouragingly and pressed on. “Then the misunderstanding at the charity gala happened and... well, things got really crazy and I didn't know how to tell you period.”

More silence.

Now she was starting to get a little worried. “Um... Lena?” Kara resisted the urge to wave a hand in front of her friend's face. “Are you... okay?”

“...I'm an idiot.”

Out of all the things Kara had been expecting Lena to say, that had not even made the list. “Um... I don't think you're an idiot,” she responded awkwardly.

At that, Lena finally shook off the vacant stare she had been sporting for the last few minutes and shot Kara a half-hearted glare. “I failed to deduce that my best friend who I see on a regular basis and the superhero who has saved my life more times than I can count are the same person. And all because of a pair of glasses. _Glasses_ , Kara. If that doesn't qualify me as an idiot, I don't know what will.”

It seemed like a bad time to think about telling this to Alex just so she'd have the pleasure of saying “I told you it worked!” so Kara shut down the thought and focused her attention back on the situation at hand. “So... um... are you mad?”

“Only at myself for being so clueless,” Lena sighed as she buried her face in her hands before she suddenly snapped her head back up. “That means... oh god.” She turned to regard both of them with an expression that was a cross between dawning horror and abject embarrassment. “I basically accused you-” she pointed at Mon-El, “-of cheating on you-” she pointed at Kara, “with... you.”

“...Pretty much,” Kara confirmed reluctantly.

“...I really am an idiot,” Lena reiterated flatly. “And I caused you so much trouble the past few days... God, I'm so sorry. Both of you. I don't know how I'll ever be able to apologise enough for this.”

“It's fine.” Kara paused. “Well, it wasn't totally fine but considering the fact that you did what you did because you were trying to be a good friend, I don't think you should be so hard on yourself.”

“Yeah, I'm glad Kara has a friend who's willing to go out of the way to take care of her even if I kind of suffered in the process,” Mon-El finally decided to chip in with a self-depreciating laugh. “And... uh, since we're in a sharing mood, I should probably tell you that I'm Supergirl's crime-fighting partner. You know, the one the gossip sites have been talking about. Also I'm an alien and my name is actually Mon-El. So... uh, hi.”

Lena stared at him. “So I accused you-” she pointed at Kara, “-of cheating on you-” she pointed at Mon-El, “with... you.”

“...Yes?” Mon-El answered hesitantly.

“Oh god.” Lena buried her face in her hands again. “There's no way you can convince me I'm not an idiot now.”

Unsure how to deal with this unexpected reaction, Kara and Mon-El could only look at each other helplessly.

“Wait.” Lena's sudden exclamation drew their attention back to her and they turned to find her scrutinising Mon-El closely. “Then who was that blonde you met with in the alleyway?”

“What blonde?” Kara asked confusedly, her gaze darting between Lena and Mon-El who now sported a panicked look on his face.

Lena's gaze turned steely. “The day after the charity gala, I followed him and saw him meeting a woman with blond hair in an alleyway who gave him something. At that time I thought she was Supergirl but since you're her...”

Even though Lena's train of thought and its implications were as clear as day, Kara refused to even consider it for a second. That didn't mean she wasn't going to ask for answers however. “Mon-El?”

The Daxamite pressed a palm against his face as he let out a sigh of defeat. “I suppose I shouldn't have expected to be able to keep it a surprise from you...” he mumbled and shuffled out of the living area in the direction of the bedroom much to the bafflement of the two women present. When he returned, he was holding an envelope which he then handed over to Kara wordlessly.

Puzzled beyond belief, Kara nevertheless accepted it without asking another question. Something told her she would get her answers inside... and the moment she saw the photos, she began to understand. “Is this...?”

“Yeah,” Mon-El mumbled with his gaze cast downwards as he scratched his jaw nervously. “You told me a while ago how you wanted a lo'gosh as a pet when you were a kid back on Krypton but your parents wouldn't allow you to have one because they felt they were too dangerous. It just so happened that I overheard Go'el – the alien in the photos – mention at the bar about a month ago that his was pregnant so I asked him if I could adopt one of the pups when it was born and he said yes. The blonde in the alleyway was Jaina, his girlfriend and she was passing me those photos that day because I'd asked how the pregnancy had gone. You're practically indestructible on Earth so the danger was non-existent and I figured you'd like one as a birthday gift, you know?”

“Birthday? But my Earth birthday's...” Kara trailed off as realisation dawned on her. “You mean my real birthday.”

He nodded bashfully and started babbling in his haste to explain himself. “I, uh, asked Winn for help and managed to figure out when it would be in Earth days. I-I hope that's okay. And if you're worried about taking care of it and whatnot, I've already asked Go'el to teach me everything I need to know. He also said it's okay to dye their fur black to disguise the fact that they're an alien species – they look like regular dogs that way – so we won't have to worry about not being able to walk them and stuff. I've even talked to Mrs Needleberg about whether pets are allowed and she said yes-”

The rest of his rambling was lost when Kara all but leaped at him and captured his lips in a kiss. “I suppose now I know why she's been winking at me every time we run into each other for the past two weeks,” she noted wryly when they parted.

A loud cough drew them out of their own little world and they were abruptly reminded that they were not alone. Again. “Sorry, Lena,” both of them said sheepishly as they broke apart.

“It's fine,” Lena waved away their apology. “I think I should take my leave now. I've gotten between the two of you enough already. Once again, words cannot express how sorry I am for all the trouble I caused both of you the past few days because of a misunderstanding on my part.”

“Apology accepted,” Kara said readily. “Besides, you can't shoulder all the blame; if I hadn't kept the truth from you-”

“Kara, I understand why you didn't tell me so don't apologise for that,” Lena cut her off sternly. “Considering what Lex did, I'm just grateful you felt like you could trust me with your secret in the end so... thank you.” She turned to face Mon-El. “And you as well. You didn't have to tell me yours but you did anyway and I promise I will never betray that trust.”

“Thanks Lena,” he responded with a warm smile.

“Well then.” Lena straightened and turned towards the front door. “I'm going to see myself out now and leave the two of you alone. I have a feeling you have a lot of catching up to do now that I'm not actively disrupting your lives. Goodnight, both of you.”

“...So,” Kara said as she turned to wrap her arms around Mon-El's neck again once they'd bid Lena goodnight and the door had closed behind her. “You were going to surprise me with a pet I've always dreamed of having since I was a kid on my actual birthday.”

“Yeah, but I can't exactly surprise you now that you know about it though,” he pointed out accurately as he locked his arms around her waist and pulled her even closer.

“I could pretend to act surprised when you give it to me on my birthday if you want,” she offered helpfully.

He raised an eyebrow at that. “I don't think that'll work, Ms I Crinkle Whenever I Tell Even the Smallest Lie.”

“Har har. Very funny. Don't count on my showing you any amount of gratitude for your present on that day then.” A few seconds later, however, she dropped her sarcastic tone and turned serious. “Can I... ask something of you?”

Curious, he tried to guess her current state of mind but gave up almost immediately. “Sure.”

“Move in with me. Officially, I mean,” she clarified quickly. “I know most of your stuff is – or was – in my apartment instead of at the DEO already and you spend almost all your nights over here anyway so it's not going to be that much different from before. This is just... a formality. Kind of. Plus, I mean-” she shrugged her shoulders somewhat nervously, “-you _are_ getting me a pet and it only seems fair that the both of us get to take care of it together...”

The grin that formed on his face was so wide it almost hurt. “I'd love that. Thank you.”

“Don't thank me just yet. Making it official means you get to pay your share of the rent, you know,” she pointed out although she was clearly holding back a smile as she said it.

“What, you mean me cooking all those meals before this didn't count?” he gasped with mock surprise. “I feel so cheated.”

“That's what you'd call additional charges,” she shot back with a giggle. “Sorry, you got a raw deal and you're just going to have to live with it.”

“I knew I should've read the fine print,” he complained theatrically even as he leaned in to kiss her. “Any other conditions I should be aware of before I sign over my soul for good?”

For some reason, Kara's gaze suddenly turned shy. “Well, I'd like to make a very small and inconsequential request if that's all right with you...”

Looking into the blue eyes he still associated with comets, Mon-El knew in that moment that he would move heaven and earth to give her everything her heart desired. “What is it?”

She seemed to reconsider whatever she was thinking for a moment before she finally worked up the courage to give voice to her thoughts. “Keep the beard.”

**Author's Note:**

> First, let me start off by saying Merry Christmas and Happy Holidays to my fellow Karamels! I hope all of you are having a good time even if you don't happen to celebrate Christmas because it's the holidays and holidays are always good. After all, if it's not a holiday it's a horrid day! (gets booed) Hey, it's a funny joke!
> 
> But anyway, I know it's been a rough year for us with its many ups and downs where our ship is concerned. Mostly downs especially lately... which is why I figured I'd try to put a funny spin on some of the things that are currently causing us a lot of grief in an effort to help everyone end this year on a positive note. Funnily enough, this idea is actually several months old and the wedding stuff was part of it long before there were even any rumours about the twist floating around. (Does that make me psychic?)
> 
> Truth be told, I came close to trashing this story several times because I wasn't sure if it was fluffy or funny enough but the friend I mentioned before offered to read it and said that yes, it is actually fluffy and funny so you can thank them for helping this fic finally see the light of day. (If you're reading this, thanks again.) Hopefully you guys liked it and came to the same conclusion.
> 
> Once again, hope you guys enjoy the holidays (special shout-out to those of you who took part in the Secret Santa for helping spread the cheer in the fandom; I would've joined except I don't have a Tumblr account and I was already tied up with this fic) and I'll see you all next year with more fluff and angst. May 2018 be a good year for our ship and all of us. Cheers!


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